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00:00:20,721 --> 00:00:23,323
When I look back on my
Sophomore year in high school,
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00:00:23,323 --> 00:00:26,383
I was...well...
a uniquely tragic wreck.
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00:00:26,660 --> 00:00:28,428
In subsequent time,
there have been some,
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00:00:28,428 --> 00:00:31,192
friend and foe alike who have come
to question this claim.
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00:00:31,532 --> 00:00:33,295
But I come armed with proof.
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At times like these I like to think
about the moments
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before I go on a roller coaster
and feel the need
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00:00:38,438 --> 00:00:42,033
to emulate announcements one might
hear while waiting in line for such a ride.
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00:00:42,376 --> 00:00:44,003
Because what you are about to witness
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00:00:44,111 --> 00:00:45,738
is not for the weak-of-heart,
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00:00:46,113 --> 00:00:47,648
the easily offended
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or those individuals who suffer
from a fragile constitution.
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If you fall into any of these categories,
I would urge you:
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00:00:53,987 --> 00:00:55,249
leave now.
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Pregnant women are cautioned as well.
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00:00:57,824 --> 00:01:01,089
Anyway, that's me:
right there, Chance Marquis.
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A name my dear departed
mother thought
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apropos for the gamble
she took on having me.
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00:01:05,933 --> 00:01:08,424
High school's a mess
for a lot of us, I realize.
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But in comparison to my mess,
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you might feel a twinge of guilt
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for ever thinking yours was
at all challenging.
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After all,
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00:01:16,109 --> 00:01:18,077
everything's about perspective,
is it not?
25
00:01:18,579 --> 00:01:21,139
So, allow me to provide you
with some...
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00:01:21,715 --> 00:01:24,377
...Oh but this isn't
where my story begins.
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00:01:24,685 --> 00:01:27,254
It starts one year earlier
when I entered
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00:01:27,254 --> 00:01:29,620
Brickland International High School
as a transfer.
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00:01:29,890 --> 00:01:34,293
My fourth new school in the last four years
and my first time in Europe.
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Keep in mind, this was the '80s.
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Sometimes known as
the decade fashion forgot.
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Like leg warmers,
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00:01:45,906 --> 00:01:48,466
always essential when getting ready
for first period Algebra.
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00:01:49,209 --> 00:01:52,906
There was also a preponderance of
thin ties and mullet haircuts.
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00:01:53,614 --> 00:01:54,376
In any case,
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00:01:54,715 --> 00:01:57,775
even then I recognized all
this conformity as tragic.
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00:01:58,151 --> 00:02:01,054
That one day we'd look back
on the parachute pants
38
00:02:01,054 --> 00:02:02,783
and obsession over Smurfs
and ask ourselves...
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00:02:03,724 --> 00:02:04,213
Why?
40
00:02:04,958 --> 00:02:06,550
But if the fashion was nightmare-ish
41
00:02:06,760 --> 00:02:08,125
at least the music was good...
42
00:02:08,395 --> 00:02:10,697
which provided a fairly accurate soundtrack
43
00:02:10,697 --> 00:02:12,961
to the comic tragedy
that was my life back then.
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00:03:46,293 --> 00:03:46,526
I was assigned locker No. 13.
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00:03:46,526 --> 00:03:47,959
I was assigned locker No. 13.
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00:03:48,228 --> 00:03:50,753
It was a bad omen...and then this:
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00:03:51,932 --> 00:03:53,490
Within minutes, it was evident,
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00:03:53,867 --> 00:03:54,629
I was in hell...
49
00:03:56,703 --> 00:03:57,328
literally.
50
00:03:58,105 --> 00:04:00,273
We've got spirit, yes we do!
51
00:04:00,273 --> 00:04:02,207
We've got spirit and how 'bout you?!
52
00:04:02,976 --> 00:04:04,341
I think it's in my locker...
53
00:04:04,778 --> 00:04:05,904
trying to get out, apparently.
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00:04:18,058 --> 00:04:19,150
Faggot.
55
00:04:19,926 --> 00:04:21,518
Oh really, no...
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00:04:21,795 --> 00:04:22,763
don't feel the need to announce your
57
00:04:22,763 --> 00:04:24,628
your sexual-persuasion for my benefit.
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00:04:25,465 --> 00:04:26,591
Not me, man. You!
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00:04:27,300 --> 00:04:30,098
I can smell the stench all over you.
It stinks!
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00:04:31,138 --> 00:04:32,773
Which begs the question:
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00:04:32,773 --> 00:04:34,604
What were you just sniffing
to pick up the scent?
62
00:04:35,142 --> 00:04:36,131
Their jock-straps?
63
00:04:39,379 --> 00:04:39,970
Listen,
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00:04:40,380 --> 00:04:41,870
here's the rule, Mr. Peanut.
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00:04:42,449 --> 00:04:44,518
You do not speak to me unless
I give you permission.
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00:04:44,518 --> 00:04:45,416
You understand?
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00:04:46,286 --> 00:04:47,446
I understand.
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00:04:47,521 --> 00:04:48,749
I'm just not going to comply.
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00:04:50,223 --> 00:04:52,657
I did not give you permission to speak,
homo-breath!
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00:04:53,260 --> 00:04:54,420
He is making me crabby.
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00:04:55,061 --> 00:04:58,121
And here I thought
that was your natural state... Aahhh!
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00:04:58,198 --> 00:04:59,859
Brad, what are you doing?
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00:05:00,300 --> 00:05:01,368
And who's he?
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00:05:01,368 --> 00:05:03,268
Dead meat in about 2 seconds.
75
00:05:03,904 --> 00:05:04,563
Can you like,
76
00:05:04,771 --> 00:05:07,763
pull yourself away from
your senseless terrorizing?
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00:05:08,141 --> 00:05:09,403
We need to talk.
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00:05:09,709 --> 00:05:11,677
Did you 'like' get permission?
79
00:05:11,912 --> 00:05:13,013
You better shut-it man!
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00:05:13,013 --> 00:05:15,015
Oh my god, is he, like, raging again?
81
00:05:15,015 --> 00:05:16,414
You shut it too, Rachel!
82
00:05:17,450 --> 00:05:18,576
Brad, Brad...
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00:05:20,353 --> 00:05:21,115
Come on, let's go.
84
00:05:22,189 --> 00:05:24,384
I'm telling you, Willy Wonka is history.
85
00:05:26,660 --> 00:05:27,684
Brad Harden...
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00:05:27,794 --> 00:05:28,783
and cronies.
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00:05:29,162 --> 00:05:30,151
I would ruminate more,
88
00:05:30,430 --> 00:05:32,330
but we'll just let Brad read his own lines,
89
00:05:33,133 --> 00:05:35,567
only in the more Neanderthal manner
befitting his 'character'.
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00:05:44,411 --> 00:05:45,844
Are you Chance Marquis?
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00:05:46,980 --> 00:05:48,208
The one and only.
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00:05:48,381 --> 00:05:49,177
Great!
93
00:05:49,316 --> 00:05:50,374
I'm Loretta Getzick,
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00:05:50,684 --> 00:05:52,786
Devil's Advocate Senior Sports Editor...
95
00:05:52,786 --> 00:05:54,344
And you're on my team.
96
00:05:54,988 --> 00:05:57,013
Um, you know I don't really do sports.
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00:05:57,791 --> 00:05:59,659
I know that most baseball uniforms
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00:05:59,659 --> 00:06:01,928
are inexplicably
made of a cotton-polyester blend,
99
00:06:01,928 --> 00:06:03,418
but that's about the extent of it.
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00:06:03,597 --> 00:06:05,398
Ah, you'll learn then.
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00:06:05,398 --> 00:06:08,595
We have an open slot and Ms. Utterbach
assigned you.
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00:06:09,302 --> 00:06:11,872
Well, is Ms. 'Ootle-blagh' unaware of my knack
of
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00:06:11,872 --> 00:06:14,067
covering the daily antics of Rosemary Clooney?
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00:06:14,474 --> 00:06:17,375
Or my witty commentaries
on student fashion tragedies?
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00:06:17,944 --> 00:06:19,279
It was all in my resume...
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00:06:19,279 --> 00:06:21,543
I really have no idea
what you're talking about,
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00:06:21,882 --> 00:06:23,110
nor do I care.
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00:06:23,750 --> 00:06:24,682
Joey,
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00:06:24,851 --> 00:06:26,486
five hundred words on newest
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00:06:26,486 --> 00:06:28,681
swim team member, Sara Bagshawe.
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00:06:29,089 --> 00:06:31,751
'Is that a Dolphin in our pool?'
112
00:06:32,292 --> 00:06:35,495
Kimmie, in-depth interview with
Reichen Froman,
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00:06:35,495 --> 00:06:36,463
the team mascot.
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00:06:36,463 --> 00:06:39,057
Some art students made
a new devil head for the costume.
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00:06:39,633 --> 00:06:42,261
'Too Scary or Too Merry?'
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00:06:43,503 --> 00:06:48,270
And, a big Brickland Devil's Times
welcome to...Chance!
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00:06:48,675 --> 00:06:50,666
Full-feature on the varsity football team.
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00:06:51,645 --> 00:06:52,479
I know!
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00:06:52,479 --> 00:06:54,208
We're going to see what he's made of.
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00:06:54,748 --> 00:06:57,774
In-depth interviews with players,
coaches and fans.
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00:06:58,385 --> 00:07:00,478
'Is this the year we win it all?'
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00:07:05,625 --> 00:07:07,092
All what?
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00:07:22,042 --> 00:07:24,374
Hank Hudson, Staff Photographer.
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00:07:24,878 --> 00:07:26,346
Loretta Go-Get-Em assigned me to
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00:07:26,346 --> 00:07:28,143
snap some shots
for your football piece.
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00:07:29,115 --> 00:07:30,514
Where do you want to start?
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00:07:31,451 --> 00:07:32,679
Over.
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00:07:33,053 --> 00:07:35,388
Let me ask you this,
staff-photographer-Hank-Hudson:
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00:07:35,388 --> 00:07:37,583
do you have knowledge
of this football?
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00:07:37,924 --> 00:07:38,549
Football?
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00:07:38,658 --> 00:07:39,192
Footooboo...
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00:07:39,192 --> 00:07:41,319
Well, I know that
when they play it in America,
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they call it soccer,
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00:07:43,630 --> 00:07:44,597
but it looks the same
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00:07:45,065 --> 00:07:46,862
and if you touch the ball with your hands,
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00:07:47,367 --> 00:07:48,425
they kick you out.
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Forever.
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00:07:50,670 --> 00:07:52,695
Or do they make you a goalie...?
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What's in your case?
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What's in yours?
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00:08:02,015 --> 00:08:03,141
I don't have one.
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00:08:04,084 --> 00:08:05,073
One what?
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00:08:05,852 --> 00:08:06,580
Freak.
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00:08:06,953 --> 00:08:09,217
But curiously enough,
I was warming up to him.
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00:08:10,357 --> 00:08:12,348
Huh! Urgh!
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00:08:23,036 --> 00:08:25,163
Take a picture, it'll last longer.
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00:08:25,972 --> 00:08:28,304
If that was her way of making
a witty first- impression,
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00:08:28,708 --> 00:08:31,111
then my guess was that the
pulled-too-tight pony tail
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00:08:31,111 --> 00:08:33,579
was cutting-off blood flow
to her brain.
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00:08:38,151 --> 00:08:39,482
I don't 'do' tennis.
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00:08:40,120 --> 00:08:42,111
Forty-love and deuce and shit...
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00:08:42,655 --> 00:08:44,282
no wonder the British lost,
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00:08:44,524 --> 00:08:46,292
can't even figure out
how to score stuff.
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00:08:46,292 --> 00:08:48,228
The origin of scoring
is French actually,
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bastardized into English.
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Deuce for instance,
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being a corruption of 'deux',
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00:08:52,499 --> 00:08:54,558
meaning two consecutive exchanges
needed to win.
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00:08:54,768 --> 00:08:57,794
Now 'love' is either a vulgarisation
of the word 'l'oeuf'...
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00:08:57,937 --> 00:09:00,405
Please, your dorkiness
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00:09:00,573 --> 00:09:03,041
was already established with
the top-hat and cane.
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00:09:05,278 --> 00:09:05,869
Look,
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Heretic can't see over
to this backstop.
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Which means
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I don't have to hit a stupid ball
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against a wall for 45 minutes.
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So fascinating!
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00:09:17,057 --> 00:09:17,648
Heretic?
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00:09:18,058 --> 00:09:18,683
Coach Hera.
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00:09:19,225 --> 00:09:21,352
The troglodyte
from sex-reassignment hell.
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00:09:21,661 --> 00:09:22,423
Really?
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00:09:22,829 --> 00:09:23,796
She was a he?
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00:09:24,564 --> 00:09:25,724
In actuality,
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00:09:26,866 --> 00:09:28,060
who the hell knows?
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in my made-up reality,
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yes!
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00:09:31,404 --> 00:09:32,305
I'm Chance.
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00:09:32,305 --> 00:09:34,603
Your reality just might fascinate me.
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Twyla.
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00:09:35,875 --> 00:09:37,502
And your pasty-white legs
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00:09:38,211 --> 00:09:39,701
definitely repulse me.
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00:09:40,380 --> 00:09:42,644
If the shorts weren't so dark,
the contrast would be lessened.
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00:09:42,782 --> 00:09:45,910
Ergo, my legs would not appear
so falsely pale.
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00:09:47,087 --> 00:09:49,112
You don't have many friends,
do you Chance?
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I just moved here.
186
00:09:52,125 --> 00:09:53,615
So far, I hate it.
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Not likely to change.
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00:10:01,935 --> 00:10:04,426
Chance Marquis,
please report to Administration.
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00:10:05,138 --> 00:10:05,866
Now.
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00:10:06,139 --> 00:10:07,299
Admin's that way...
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00:10:12,245 --> 00:10:14,213
Chance Marquis...
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00:10:14,414 --> 00:10:16,575
Vice Principal Ophelia Smelker.
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00:10:16,716 --> 00:10:19,207
As disturbing in-person as she
appears in her photos,
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00:10:19,419 --> 00:10:22,820
and quite possibly the most odorous human
I've ever encountered...
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00:10:23,223 --> 00:10:24,554
and not in a pleasing way.
196
00:10:24,824 --> 00:10:26,155
Remove the hat, please.
197
00:10:27,260 --> 00:10:30,058
Looking over your file here...
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00:10:31,397 --> 00:10:33,422
Transfer records, report cards,
199
00:10:33,533 --> 00:10:34,966
personal items.
200
00:10:35,735 --> 00:10:38,727
Why aren't you enrolled
in our mixed choir?
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00:10:39,706 --> 00:10:41,264
Uh, polyps.
202
00:10:41,474 --> 00:10:42,566
I beg your pardon.
203
00:10:43,443 --> 00:10:45,468
Polyps. On my vocal cords.
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00:10:45,712 --> 00:10:47,236
I can't sing until they heal.
205
00:10:47,647 --> 00:10:49,410
What about surgery?
206
00:10:49,749 --> 00:10:50,875
It's against our religion.
207
00:10:51,551 --> 00:10:52,848
Which is...?
208
00:10:54,053 --> 00:10:55,350
Not to be discussed.
209
00:10:59,993 --> 00:11:04,464
Your permanent records show,
among other things,
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00:11:04,464 --> 00:11:06,766
instances of misbehavior,
211
00:11:06,766 --> 00:11:09,802
insubordination and episodes of...
212
00:11:09,802 --> 00:11:12,930
channelling deceased torch singers,
213
00:11:13,273 --> 00:11:18,506
such as: Rosemary Clooney, Dionne Warwick
and Ethel Merman.
214
00:11:18,912 --> 00:11:21,346
Care to explain that one?
215
00:11:21,447 --> 00:11:23,711
I'd rather not, it's personal.
216
00:11:23,850 --> 00:11:24,782
And quite frankly,
217
00:11:24,918 --> 00:11:27,409
I don't remember because
I'm not 'au courant' when it happens.
218
00:11:32,625 --> 00:11:34,752
There's one thing you will have to explain:
219
00:11:34,928 --> 00:11:35,895
your locker.
220
00:11:36,462 --> 00:11:40,125
Destruction of school property
is a severe offense.
221
00:11:40,934 --> 00:11:41,866
As it should be.
222
00:11:42,435 --> 00:11:44,198
But my question to you would be this:
223
00:11:44,404 --> 00:11:46,539
what branch of logic do you cleave to
224
00:11:46,539 --> 00:11:48,973
that would explain why I
would destroy my own locker?
225
00:11:54,180 --> 00:11:57,377
The first day of school
is often filled with rage...
226
00:11:57,517 --> 00:12:00,281
especially for transfer students.
227
00:12:04,290 --> 00:12:09,057
V-P Smelker runs a tight ship here
at Brickland High.
228
00:12:10,263 --> 00:12:13,323
Her tolerance is low for wiseacres.
229
00:12:13,466 --> 00:12:16,196
And even lower for weirdoes.
230
00:12:16,603 --> 00:12:17,729
CAPEESH?!
231
00:12:18,838 --> 00:12:22,899
I was unaware that overweight women from the
Eastern block used words like 'capeesh'.
232
00:12:36,723 --> 00:12:38,918
Then Mrs. Zito split us into groups.
233
00:12:39,192 --> 00:12:41,456
I'm in the 'Alligators' for math and science.
234
00:12:41,794 --> 00:12:43,386
And where do the Alligators rank?
235
00:12:43,796 --> 00:12:46,697
Starts with an 'A', Sir. Duh! Tippy-top.
236
00:12:46,966 --> 00:12:48,524
Outstanding. Excellent!
237
00:12:50,103 --> 00:12:51,400
What's that doing on the table?
238
00:12:53,006 --> 00:12:54,633
Chance wore it to school today.
239
00:12:55,808 --> 00:12:57,867
What next, a dress?
240
00:12:58,311 --> 00:12:59,335
My dad.
241
00:12:59,612 --> 00:13:02,274
A man who never met a rule
he didn't try out at least once...
242
00:13:02,949 --> 00:13:03,973
or a firearm.
243
00:13:04,517 --> 00:13:06,917
What kind of reaction do you get when
you show up with something like that on?
244
00:13:07,754 --> 00:13:08,686
It varies.
245
00:13:09,322 --> 00:13:11,882
The people behind me get upset because
they can't see the blackboard...
246
00:13:12,392 --> 00:13:13,154
Due to the hat.
247
00:13:14,294 --> 00:13:15,818
Mostly, they just miss the point.
248
00:13:16,095 --> 00:13:17,323
Which is what, exactly?
249
00:13:17,697 --> 00:13:20,800
That my chosen expression of
individualism should be embraced,
250
00:13:20,800 --> 00:13:21,767
not ridiculed.
251
00:13:22,802 --> 00:13:24,497
Someone hit him in the head
with a tennis ball.
252
00:13:25,805 --> 00:13:27,840
Then he got sent
to the Vice Principal
253
00:13:27,840 --> 00:13:29,899
after a bully called him
a homosexual.
254
00:13:30,410 --> 00:13:31,172
Sienna,
255
00:13:31,344 --> 00:13:33,539
my real sister with the fake accent.
256
00:13:33,846 --> 00:13:36,838
I tell her everything and, quite often,
live to regret it.
257
00:13:37,917 --> 00:13:40,215
Why did they send you
to the principal's office for that?
258
00:13:41,154 --> 00:13:41,950
Long story.
259
00:13:42,722 --> 00:13:44,314
She already has it out for me though.
260
00:13:44,691 --> 00:13:46,926
She's also one of the largest women
I've ever seen...
261
00:13:46,926 --> 00:13:48,325
like circus-large.
262
00:13:48,828 --> 00:13:50,263
I'm sure if she were to grow a beard,
263
00:13:50,263 --> 00:13:52,198
which I'm quite certain she's capable of-
264
00:13:52,198 --> 00:13:53,096
Chance,
265
00:13:54,000 --> 00:13:54,898
understood.
266
00:13:58,171 --> 00:14:00,002
Sounds like
you had a rough day, Cadet.
267
00:14:01,040 --> 00:14:02,475
But I think you forgot
rule number one,
268
00:14:02,475 --> 00:14:04,243
which is: when kids call you names,
269
00:14:04,243 --> 00:14:05,311
you stand up for yourself
270
00:14:05,311 --> 00:14:06,369
like a man.
271
00:14:08,081 --> 00:14:09,446
I think he needs more R-T-T.
272
00:14:10,817 --> 00:14:12,585
Retrograde Tactical Training?
273
00:14:12,585 --> 00:14:13,517
Roger that.
274
00:14:14,487 --> 00:14:16,216
What did you enjoy most about that?
275
00:14:17,790 --> 00:14:18,654
Jujitsu.
276
00:14:18,858 --> 00:14:19,324
Aye!
277
00:14:20,193 --> 00:14:21,524
When I was nine.
278
00:14:23,396 --> 00:14:24,761
'Kids' aren't calling me names.
279
00:14:25,164 --> 00:14:26,358
One of them, Brad Harden,
280
00:14:26,499 --> 00:14:27,466
called me 'homo-breath,'
281
00:14:27,767 --> 00:14:28,995
but he started off with 'faggot'.
282
00:14:29,469 --> 00:14:30,367
Chance,
283
00:14:31,404 --> 00:14:33,497
you know I don't like to hear
that word in this house.
284
00:14:35,775 --> 00:14:37,470
As opposed to just living with one?
285
00:14:55,528 --> 00:14:56,586
Getting settled in?
286
00:15:00,867 --> 00:15:01,925
Listen Chance,
287
00:15:03,069 --> 00:15:05,367
a unit is only as strong
as its weakest link.
288
00:15:06,839 --> 00:15:08,431
It's my job to shore up the links.
289
00:15:12,979 --> 00:15:14,037
Do you understand?
290
00:15:16,182 --> 00:15:16,876
Chance,
291
00:15:18,918 --> 00:15:19,782
understood?
292
00:15:24,123 --> 00:15:24,919
Lights out soon.
293
00:15:30,696 --> 00:15:32,857
I said come back here right now.
294
00:15:33,433 --> 00:15:35,993
Don't walk away from me,
we're not done discussing this!
295
00:15:36,235 --> 00:15:37,703
Well, I'm done discussing it!
296
00:15:37,703 --> 00:15:41,264
Did you ever think that playing football
is not the answer to everything?
297
00:15:41,707 --> 00:15:44,437
Then explain to me how you're
gonna pay for your tuition!
298
00:15:46,045 --> 00:15:47,603
How are you gonna pay
for your studies?!
299
00:15:48,448 --> 00:15:50,216
You think its me
who's gonna pay for that!
300
00:15:50,216 --> 00:15:51,951
I don't care,
I'll figure something out!
301
00:15:51,951 --> 00:15:53,920
Don't blow this
football scholarship, Lee.
302
00:15:53,920 --> 00:15:56,286
Start figuring that out and soon!!
303
00:16:58,351 --> 00:17:02,981
Sometimes life has a strange way of giving
you EXACTLY what you want.
304
00:17:12,331 --> 00:17:13,766
And then making you pay,
305
00:17:13,766 --> 00:17:15,097
dearly.
306
00:17:35,821 --> 00:17:38,688
So, does your dad keep like,
guns and artillery at home?
307
00:17:39,158 --> 00:17:40,420
Uh, affirmative.
308
00:17:40,993 --> 00:17:43,296
The hand-grenades are stored
in the dining buffet
309
00:17:43,296 --> 00:17:44,888
and he only loads the semi-automatics,
310
00:17:45,364 --> 00:17:46,956
but we feel very safe.
311
00:17:48,634 --> 00:17:50,469
Are you trying to piss me off on purpose?
312
00:17:50,469 --> 00:17:51,800
Because sittin' here
313
00:17:52,004 --> 00:17:54,740
with you two losers is doing
nothing for my reputation.
314
00:17:54,740 --> 00:17:57,140
And, for the record...you are poison.
315
00:17:57,610 --> 00:17:59,407
And you're... plain toxic.
316
00:18:00,546 --> 00:18:04,073
Well, your reputation, from what
I observe, is pretty much non-existent.
317
00:18:04,383 --> 00:18:06,686
So at least being seen with us,
you have fumes of relevance.
318
00:18:06,686 --> 00:18:07,948
It's a step up in my book.
319
00:18:12,325 --> 00:18:13,587
Do you smell that?
320
00:18:15,194 --> 00:18:16,354
Students...
321
00:18:17,563 --> 00:18:19,292
On the bench Miss Tiller.
322
00:18:19,599 --> 00:18:21,499
Tables are not chairs.
323
00:18:27,540 --> 00:18:29,132
Mr. Hudson,
324
00:18:29,942 --> 00:18:31,807
open your briefcase please.
325
00:18:33,012 --> 00:18:33,706
Why?
326
00:18:34,246 --> 00:18:35,781
A general inspection.
327
00:18:35,781 --> 00:18:37,578
This is private property.
328
00:18:38,818 --> 00:18:40,809
That's illegal search and seizure.
329
00:18:41,153 --> 00:18:42,347
Not on this campus.
330
00:18:42,888 --> 00:18:45,482
This school is beholden
to a different law:
331
00:18:45,992 --> 00:18:48,392
'V-P Smelker's Law.'
332
00:18:49,195 --> 00:18:50,787
OPEN IT!
333
00:19:00,373 --> 00:19:01,601
What happened to your eye?
334
00:19:02,441 --> 00:19:03,643
Nothing,
335
00:19:03,643 --> 00:19:04,803
why do you inquire?
336
00:19:13,719 --> 00:19:14,879
Could you move those?
337
00:19:20,660 --> 00:19:23,322
Ahh, I missed
the first two days of class...
338
00:19:24,363 --> 00:19:26,627
Ms. Hughes said you
were the only solo left.
339
00:19:27,633 --> 00:19:29,498
Guess that makes us lab partners.
340
00:19:30,136 --> 00:19:33,372
Well, I pride myself on being the last
chosen, not only in sports,
341
00:19:33,372 --> 00:19:35,431
but in combustible experiments as well.
342
00:19:38,711 --> 00:19:39,575
I'm Levi.
343
00:19:40,046 --> 00:19:41,013
Uh, Chance Marquis.
344
00:19:41,247 --> 00:19:43,511
Chance. C-H-A-N-C-E. Chance.
345
00:19:51,657 --> 00:19:53,284
I think we're neighbors...
346
00:19:56,829 --> 00:19:59,832
I don't suppose you'd believe
I have an identical twin brother
347
00:19:59,832 --> 00:20:01,356
who looks exactly like me...
348
00:20:06,639 --> 00:20:09,164
I can show you how to rig your
cable box for the porn channels.
349
00:20:12,344 --> 00:20:14,812
Hey, forget about it -
I already have. Okay?
350
00:20:17,883 --> 00:20:20,647
I wish my ex-girlfriend looked at me
like that a couple of times, though.
351
00:20:23,823 --> 00:20:24,915
What happened to your eye?
352
00:20:26,192 --> 00:20:26,992
Nothing.
353
00:20:26,992 --> 00:20:27,754
Why?
354
00:20:42,007 --> 00:20:43,133
Hey, Cinderfella,
355
00:20:43,642 --> 00:20:45,507
the women's locker room
is on the other side.
356
00:20:48,114 --> 00:20:51,242
Oh! Um...
Listen up sporty-type-fellas.
357
00:20:51,584 --> 00:20:53,185
Look, I'm doing a piece on the team
358
00:20:53,185 --> 00:20:54,620
for the paper and was really, really
359
00:20:54,620 --> 00:20:55,848
hoping for some interviews?
360
00:20:56,689 --> 00:20:58,486
You breakin' my no-talk rule again?
361
00:20:59,692 --> 00:21:01,319
Why do you have to defy me? Huh?!
362
00:21:01,827 --> 00:21:02,962
Call me a masochist.
363
00:21:02,962 --> 00:21:04,327
I'll call you a douche-bag,
364
00:21:05,498 --> 00:21:06,590
'cuz that's what you are.
365
00:21:09,068 --> 00:21:09,727
Listen up!
366
00:21:10,269 --> 00:21:12,567
As the team captain,
I'm giving a direct order here...
367
00:21:13,172 --> 00:21:15,574
Nobody talks to the douche-bag
about our team.
368
00:21:15,574 --> 00:21:16,165
You got it?
369
00:21:16,575 --> 00:21:17,667
Not one word, okay?
370
00:21:18,010 --> 00:21:18,669
How come?
371
00:21:19,245 --> 00:21:21,770
Well, you see Gus man...
that's why I'm here.
372
00:21:22,815 --> 00:21:24,248
To think when your brain pauses.
373
00:21:25,751 --> 00:21:27,514
You don't want homosexuals
in your head.
374
00:21:27,686 --> 00:21:30,280
Give 'em a crack and
375
00:21:30,456 --> 00:21:32,124
you're listenin' to 'Sister Christian'
376
00:21:32,124 --> 00:21:34,718
and jerking off
to pictures of Patrick Swayze!
377
00:21:35,094 --> 00:21:36,322
Night Ranger's gay?
378
00:21:36,695 --> 00:21:38,788
Well, who knows man,
but that fuckin' song is!
379
00:21:39,532 --> 00:21:41,167
Patrick Swayze pictures?
380
00:21:41,167 --> 00:21:42,930
Or Rick Springfield,
you know whoever!
381
00:21:43,836 --> 00:21:46,134
Look, the point is...
382
00:21:46,806 --> 00:21:48,569
he'll just write some girlie article
383
00:21:49,241 --> 00:21:50,731
that'll make us look like girls!
384
00:21:55,414 --> 00:21:56,472
I'm sorry fruit-fly,
385
00:21:58,551 --> 00:21:59,950
but that's the way the fudge is packed.
386
00:22:11,664 --> 00:22:13,791
Why do you let him call you those names?
387
00:22:14,967 --> 00:22:20,166
Well, where I show anger and agitation over
his derogatory comments regarding what I am,
388
00:22:20,573 --> 00:22:21,938
I bequeath him power, no?
389
00:22:23,576 --> 00:22:27,706
And I've deduced that since Brad's intelligence
hovers only slightly above that of burnt toast,
390
00:22:28,714 --> 00:22:30,443
why give him that kind of control over me?
391
00:23:10,089 --> 00:23:12,557
The 'Split Infinitives' ladies and gentlemen.
392
00:23:13,692 --> 00:23:14,716
Not bad, huh?
393
00:23:14,827 --> 00:23:16,192
A back-beat would help.
394
00:23:16,896 --> 00:23:18,056
Drummer's taking a leak.
395
00:23:19,531 --> 00:23:20,259
What do you think?
396
00:23:21,000 --> 00:23:23,202
Ah, I... I think,
397
00:23:23,202 --> 00:23:24,931
Foreigner songs
are better left to... Foreigner?
398
00:23:25,204 --> 00:23:26,535
That wasn't Foreigner.
399
00:23:26,906 --> 00:23:28,567
Do you ever cover the Carpenters?
400
00:23:28,874 --> 00:23:30,535
Karen has a lovely voice.
401
00:23:37,516 --> 00:23:39,211
Hey! What's the faggot doing here?
402
00:23:43,088 --> 00:23:44,521
Your band is dreadful.
403
00:23:44,790 --> 00:23:47,281
But they're actually
a lot better without you!
404
00:23:50,596 --> 00:23:51,460
A real cute kid.
405
00:24:04,576 --> 00:24:05,804
Take a chill-pill,
406
00:24:06,378 --> 00:24:09,541
you'll totally smell her before
she gets within 50 yards.
407
00:24:09,748 --> 00:24:11,181
A hundred if we're downwind.
408
00:24:11,850 --> 00:24:13,681
She's in my nightmares.
409
00:24:14,186 --> 00:24:16,882
She IS my nightmares...
410
00:24:18,157 --> 00:24:21,183
Hey, you guys wanna go into
the city this weekend?
411
00:24:21,393 --> 00:24:23,020
I have this day-long photo project,
412
00:24:23,295 --> 00:24:24,163
what I have to do, see,
413
00:24:24,163 --> 00:24:26,732
is take a picture
every hour of the same thing and-
414
00:24:26,732 --> 00:24:28,701
Okay. We'll go.
415
00:24:28,701 --> 00:24:30,066
And for future reference,
416
00:24:30,269 --> 00:24:32,999
we don't care that much about
your photo projects.
417
00:24:33,272 --> 00:24:34,466
So fascinating!
418
00:24:55,294 --> 00:24:56,318
Can I just ask:
419
00:24:56,528 --> 00:24:59,463
what's proper protocol should this
vehicle spontaneously combust?
420
00:24:59,932 --> 00:25:02,134
Look Prince Weird-Clothes,
421
00:25:02,134 --> 00:25:05,592
if his highness would rather walk,
I can pull over right now.
422
00:25:05,904 --> 00:25:07,030
Zip it...
423
00:25:49,048 --> 00:25:50,310
Finally.
424
00:25:50,416 --> 00:25:52,213
Can we do something interesting now?
425
00:25:53,318 --> 00:25:54,307
I thought we were.
426
00:25:54,787 --> 00:25:56,482
Do we look interested?
427
00:25:57,589 --> 00:25:58,891
It's sort of hard to tell,
428
00:25:58,891 --> 00:26:01,860
cuz the two of you never look
interested in anything.
429
00:26:05,464 --> 00:26:06,658
I have an idea...
430
00:26:07,132 --> 00:26:09,930
I'm just not sure if two of you
are man enough...
431
00:26:10,869 --> 00:26:11,767
Are you?
432
00:26:13,138 --> 00:26:14,706
Agreed. Stupid question.
433
00:26:14,706 --> 00:26:16,401
Of course you are, Sir.
434
00:26:18,010 --> 00:26:19,102
C'mon girls.
435
00:26:19,912 --> 00:26:22,142
This looks like a nice
upscale neighborhood.
436
00:26:23,015 --> 00:26:24,349
Look out for the curve...
437
00:26:24,349 --> 00:26:25,907
Relax... I'm parking.
438
00:26:38,597 --> 00:26:40,394
Those things will kill you.
439
00:26:40,866 --> 00:26:42,925
They're much like dark alleys that way.
440
00:26:45,137 --> 00:26:47,469
Club Red and Blue.
441
00:26:47,739 --> 00:26:49,141
Twenty-one and over.
442
00:26:49,141 --> 00:26:50,768
So we're going in the side entrance.
443
00:26:51,376 --> 00:26:52,138
With what?
444
00:26:52,277 --> 00:26:54,472
A battering ram and fake police badges?
445
00:26:56,181 --> 00:26:57,614
C'mon, just follow me.
446
00:26:59,118 --> 00:27:00,142
What kind of club is this?
447
00:27:00,452 --> 00:27:01,476
You'll see.
448
00:27:08,127 --> 00:27:08,991
Hey Sasha.
449
00:27:09,294 --> 00:27:11,159
Hi Twyla, how are you?
450
00:27:11,630 --> 00:27:12,431
I'm sixteen,
451
00:27:12,431 --> 00:27:14,831
in high school
and I got two losers in-tow.
452
00:27:15,300 --> 00:27:18,904
Life just continues
to suck big ostrich eggs.
453
00:27:18,904 --> 00:27:19,928
Yeah, yeah, yeah...
454
00:29:28,734 --> 00:29:30,099
You lost, sweetie?
455
00:29:30,669 --> 00:29:32,034
Help me with the dress, will you.
456
00:29:50,956 --> 00:29:52,321
So schoolboy,
457
00:29:52,457 --> 00:29:53,754
how do they call you?
458
00:29:54,026 --> 00:29:55,118
Chance Marquis.
459
00:29:55,861 --> 00:29:56,953
Claire Vuoyant.
460
00:29:57,796 --> 00:29:59,286
What a fabulous name.
461
00:29:59,731 --> 00:30:01,961
Give my regards
to the angel who named you.
462
00:30:02,634 --> 00:30:04,602
That would be my dear-departed mother.
463
00:30:04,870 --> 00:30:05,768
May she rest in peace.
464
00:30:07,639 --> 00:30:08,537
Claire Vuoyant,
465
00:30:08,940 --> 00:30:09,634
I like it.
466
00:30:10,142 --> 00:30:11,473
I can see queerly now!
467
00:30:13,645 --> 00:30:15,408
So, how old are you?
468
00:30:16,214 --> 00:30:17,408
Uh...twenty-two.
469
00:30:17,649 --> 00:30:20,345
Yeah, right. Six years from now, baby.
470
00:30:20,686 --> 00:30:22,916
Hum ! You don't bullshit a drag,
471
00:30:23,255 --> 00:30:25,655
especially when she's known for her
precognitive powers.
472
00:30:25,857 --> 00:30:28,792
It only leads to a heartache
and a sore rear.
473
00:30:29,361 --> 00:30:32,125
I think we're scaring
Oliver Twist over here, ladies!
474
00:30:32,564 --> 00:30:33,690
I'm not scared.
475
00:30:38,603 --> 00:30:41,907
Good, because with a little glitter
and a fabulous dress
476
00:30:41,907 --> 00:30:43,431
get your britches in a twist,
477
00:30:43,575 --> 00:30:46,169
you'll positively faint
when Lily Pad over there,
478
00:30:46,345 --> 00:30:47,710
takes her thong off.
479
00:30:50,082 --> 00:30:51,276
You were great out there tonight.
480
00:30:51,416 --> 00:30:53,043
Thank you, Rex Reed.
481
00:30:55,020 --> 00:30:56,681
Oh, don't mention the hair?
482
00:30:56,822 --> 00:30:59,552
The dress?
The dress was a star tonight!
483
00:31:00,292 --> 00:31:02,624
The whole package was astounding.
484
00:31:02,928 --> 00:31:05,988
Well, if done correctly,
the package was invisible.
485
00:31:08,500 --> 00:31:09,364
Where's Chance?
486
00:31:09,634 --> 00:31:10,794
He was right behind me.
487
00:31:10,936 --> 00:31:12,301
Go find him!
488
00:31:13,004 --> 00:31:14,130
What're you going to do?
489
00:31:14,673 --> 00:31:16,402
Wait. Have a cigarette.
490
00:31:16,842 --> 00:31:19,106
Ponder why dweebs are drawn to me.
491
00:31:22,447 --> 00:31:24,381
Well, you don't learn it, per se.
492
00:31:25,016 --> 00:31:27,484
It's more like...
it just pops out one day.
493
00:31:27,819 --> 00:31:29,218
Then you refine.
494
00:31:29,588 --> 00:31:31,852
Find the right dress, the right song,
495
00:31:32,157 --> 00:31:35,285
right name, and then you practice
till your feet bleed.
496
00:31:36,061 --> 00:31:36,618
Bitch,
497
00:31:36,962 --> 00:31:38,930
your feet wouldn't bleed if you'd admit
498
00:31:38,930 --> 00:31:43,492
to their actual big-ass largeness
and stop wearing size-sixes.
499
00:31:44,503 --> 00:31:48,269
Lily, until you stop menstruating,
talk to the hand!
500
00:31:49,508 --> 00:31:51,543
You're all so sassy and sarcastic,
501
00:31:51,543 --> 00:31:53,773
but no one retaliates
in a truly harmful way.
502
00:31:56,248 --> 00:31:57,738
I saw that bitch!
503
00:31:58,116 --> 00:32:01,108
Don't make me replace your
crack with baking soda!
504
00:32:04,389 --> 00:32:05,287
Chance?
505
00:32:08,026 --> 00:32:08,788
Here,
506
00:32:09,795 --> 00:32:11,092
you should try it some time.
507
00:32:11,329 --> 00:32:12,626
I think you'd be a natural.
508
00:32:17,402 --> 00:32:18,869
Just remember, Chance,
509
00:32:19,538 --> 00:32:20,800
this is an illusion.
510
00:32:20,939 --> 00:32:23,100
You have to make everyone believe.
511
00:32:24,409 --> 00:32:25,842
Starting with yourself.
512
00:32:50,769 --> 00:32:54,239
No-no, if you wait to jump
a half-second longer,
513
00:32:54,239 --> 00:32:56,571
the frog can make it across
in a straight shot, but--
514
00:32:56,641 --> 00:32:57,903
Hey, Tinkerbell!
515
00:33:00,245 --> 00:33:01,712
So how's the story going, man?
516
00:33:02,013 --> 00:33:02,741
You want a quote?
517
00:33:04,816 --> 00:33:05,578
Yup.
518
00:33:06,551 --> 00:33:08,178
Someday soon,
519
00:33:09,087 --> 00:33:10,577
when you least expect it,
520
00:33:11,189 --> 00:33:14,022
I am gonna totally kick
your fairy-ass.
521
00:33:15,594 --> 00:33:16,959
Brad, can we go?
522
00:33:17,562 --> 00:33:18,763
Just screwin' with him baby,
523
00:33:18,763 --> 00:33:19,923
just screwin' with him.
524
00:33:23,902 --> 00:33:25,062
Hmmm.... peanuts,
don't mind if I do.
525
00:33:29,774 --> 00:33:32,504
You familiar with the concept of REVENGE?
526
00:33:32,677 --> 00:33:36,613
Yeah, ever since Judy Hatteberg
appropriated my chalk in kindergarten.
527
00:33:37,682 --> 00:33:38,808
She paid.
528
00:33:40,285 --> 00:33:42,854
You're a shark, and Brad's the remora,
529
00:33:42,854 --> 00:33:46,187
suctioned to you tighter than spandex
on David Lee Roth.
530
00:33:46,892 --> 00:33:49,793
So, there's only one thing to do:
531
00:33:49,961 --> 00:33:51,496
grab it by its tail,
532
00:33:51,496 --> 00:33:53,896
rip it from your flesh
and then SMASH IT!
533
00:33:58,370 --> 00:34:02,136
High school is like Darwinism in a test tube:
survival of the fittest.
534
00:34:02,507 --> 00:34:06,068
Only here, because Brad outweighs
you by fifty pounds,
535
00:34:06,711 --> 00:34:09,009
fit equals smart.
536
00:34:12,350 --> 00:34:13,647
Hey Chance,
537
00:34:15,053 --> 00:34:17,920
you still need someone to interview
for your story?
538
00:34:18,356 --> 00:34:19,084
Why?
539
00:34:19,391 --> 00:34:20,792
Did you take pity on me and convince your
540
00:34:20,792 --> 00:34:23,659
best friend and favorite drummer,
Brad Harden, to sit for an interview?
541
00:34:23,795 --> 00:34:25,126
Brad hates you.
542
00:34:25,830 --> 00:34:28,458
Besides, the only thing
that convinces Brad of anything
543
00:34:28,967 --> 00:34:29,729
is Brad.
544
00:34:30,335 --> 00:34:31,233
Or Toni.
545
00:34:31,903 --> 00:34:34,303
But even then, it's only when
she's denying him sex.
546
00:34:36,608 --> 00:34:40,442
Anyway, I was thinkin' you
could interview me.
547
00:34:42,013 --> 00:34:45,210
Well, I hate to point out the fact that
you might be as dense as a redwood, Levi,
548
00:34:45,350 --> 00:34:47,619
but I need to interview someone who
actually plays on the team.
549
00:34:47,619 --> 00:34:49,348
Ergo, not you.
550
00:34:49,454 --> 00:34:50,944
I appreciate the insult.
551
00:34:51,356 --> 00:34:52,220
What insult?
552
00:34:52,490 --> 00:34:54,659
I'm a first-string forward.
553
00:34:54,659 --> 00:34:56,661
I haven't been practicing
because of a knee injury,
554
00:34:56,661 --> 00:34:58,788
but it should be okay by
the season opener.
555
00:34:58,930 --> 00:34:59,631
Wait, wait... What?
556
00:34:59,631 --> 00:35:01,496
You're getting around
to telling me this, now?
557
00:35:02,033 --> 00:35:04,501
I thought you'd appreciate the,
you know...
558
00:35:04,970 --> 00:35:06,335
dramatic pause.
559
00:35:07,806 --> 00:35:08,534
Why?
560
00:35:09,007 --> 00:35:11,840
Aren't your people all into
drama and stuff?
561
00:35:12,644 --> 00:35:16,341
You're so correct, right up there with
gingham and party-planning.
562
00:35:16,581 --> 00:35:19,880
My 'people' are also into
the fashionably ironic,
563
00:35:20,385 --> 00:35:22,376
but I'll make an exception in your case.
564
00:35:27,092 --> 00:35:29,560
Hey! I can be ironic!
565
00:35:34,432 --> 00:35:36,423
Dang, is this inside out?
566
00:35:40,171 --> 00:35:41,468
What's your favorite kind of music?
567
00:35:42,307 --> 00:35:43,239
I like lots of music.
568
00:35:44,976 --> 00:35:47,444
Correction. I love music.
569
00:35:50,815 --> 00:35:52,442
When is your band playing next?
570
00:35:57,355 --> 00:35:59,721
'Seventh Annual
Battle-of-the-High-School-Bands'
571
00:36:00,859 --> 00:36:03,328
The winner gets one-free-week studio time,
572
00:36:03,328 --> 00:36:07,094
and a guaranteed listen of their music by
some big London music producer.
573
00:36:07,432 --> 00:36:08,729
Pretty sweet, huh?
574
00:36:09,534 --> 00:36:11,161
I think we have a real shot.
575
00:36:12,337 --> 00:36:13,964
Who, 'we'?
576
00:36:14,906 --> 00:36:15,998
The Split-Infinitives!
577
00:36:16,207 --> 00:36:17,799
We're gonna rock the shit.
578
00:36:19,878 --> 00:36:21,368
Can I be honest with you, Chance?
579
00:36:21,913 --> 00:36:24,245
Music is my life.
580
00:36:24,683 --> 00:36:25,615
It's everything.
581
00:36:26,217 --> 00:36:28,048
I can feel it, in my soul.
582
00:36:28,486 --> 00:36:29,111
You know?
583
00:36:30,789 --> 00:36:31,949
Well, can I be honest with you?
584
00:36:33,158 --> 00:36:34,591
From what I heard, your band is...
585
00:36:35,360 --> 00:36:36,588
how do I best put this:
586
00:36:37,429 --> 00:36:38,418
God-awful.
587
00:36:39,230 --> 00:36:40,857
Fetid. Pedicular.
588
00:36:41,900 --> 00:36:43,527
And by pedicular, I mean lousy.
589
00:36:44,235 --> 00:36:45,566
I don't expect you to get it.
590
00:36:45,937 --> 00:36:47,605
People who feel the music,
591
00:36:47,605 --> 00:36:49,004
who can't live without it,
592
00:36:49,207 --> 00:36:50,174
they get it.
593
00:36:51,109 --> 00:36:52,371
Besides, we'll get better.
594
00:36:52,777 --> 00:36:53,545
Levi?
595
00:36:53,545 --> 00:36:54,910
Oh, didn't know you had company.
596
00:36:55,313 --> 00:36:56,114
This is Chance.
597
00:36:56,114 --> 00:36:57,103
He lives next door.
598
00:36:57,515 --> 00:36:59,005
How's the knee, you run today?
599
00:37:01,753 --> 00:37:04,085
Chance is writing an article on the team
for the school paper.
600
00:37:04,622 --> 00:37:05,520
That right?
601
00:37:05,990 --> 00:37:07,258
Lee's the best!
602
00:37:07,258 --> 00:37:10,421
He's gonna have U.S. university recruiters
salivating over him this year,
603
00:37:11,062 --> 00:37:12,029
right, Lee?
604
00:37:12,997 --> 00:37:14,089
Right, Dad.
605
00:37:21,339 --> 00:37:24,740
The rain in Spain
flows mainly in the plain...
606
00:37:29,981 --> 00:37:31,039
Braid my hair?
607
00:37:32,550 --> 00:37:34,452
'Split Infinitives'
608
00:37:34,452 --> 00:37:36,855
- that's a stupid name for a band, I think.
609
00:37:36,855 --> 00:37:38,755
You're a way better singer than he is.
610
00:37:40,325 --> 00:37:41,726
How is it you state things with such
611
00:37:41,726 --> 00:37:43,694
atypical certainty and authority?
612
00:37:44,362 --> 00:37:46,262
And in such a flawless, bogus accent?
613
00:37:47,866 --> 00:37:49,766
It's like you know exactly what everyone
should be doing...
614
00:37:50,835 --> 00:37:51,995
Or what they should be.
615
00:37:53,071 --> 00:37:54,561
Not what, who.
616
00:37:55,006 --> 00:37:56,940
For instance, I am a beauty queen.
617
00:37:57,142 --> 00:37:58,877
Do I push that away? No,
618
00:37:58,877 --> 00:37:59,969
I embrace it.
619
00:38:00,311 --> 00:38:02,871
And mastering this accent is the
final piece in the puzzle...
620
00:38:03,148 --> 00:38:05,412
that is, Miss U.K. Junior
twelve-and-under.
621
00:38:07,418 --> 00:38:09,113
Everyone should embrace who they are.
622
00:38:09,654 --> 00:38:10,746
Including you.
623
00:38:13,291 --> 00:38:14,692
Well, you'll learn as you get older,
624
00:38:14,692 --> 00:38:16,387
you actually know less about who you are.
625
00:38:18,997 --> 00:38:20,298
That's just silly talk.
626
00:38:20,298 --> 00:38:21,432
I know who you are.
627
00:38:21,432 --> 00:38:22,558
And what you should be.
628
00:38:26,538 --> 00:38:27,527
There you go.
629
00:38:29,307 --> 00:38:30,137
Thanks!
630
00:39:06,077 --> 00:39:07,812
Bee-rilliant!
631
00:39:07,812 --> 00:39:10,715
You really came through, Chance.
Good job!
632
00:39:10,715 --> 00:39:14,515
Hank, your photos are totally wicked!
633
00:39:15,353 --> 00:39:18,550
I think the team's going to read it
and be inspired.
634
00:39:19,023 --> 00:39:21,218
It's going to be a good season!
635
00:39:24,262 --> 00:39:25,729
They're going to blow.
636
00:39:26,064 --> 00:39:27,531
Most assuredly.
637
00:39:33,238 --> 00:39:34,569
Brilliant!
638
00:39:36,674 --> 00:39:38,107
Good to have your bender back.
639
00:39:38,309 --> 00:39:39,276
Yeah.
640
00:39:40,511 --> 00:39:42,638
So uh... I gotta ask,
641
00:39:42,881 --> 00:39:43,973
what were you thinking?
642
00:39:45,583 --> 00:39:47,847
You know, talkin' to
the jack-off for his story?
643
00:39:48,820 --> 00:39:50,521
It's just a stupid article, who cares?
644
00:39:50,521 --> 00:39:52,250
Well, everyone man.
645
00:39:52,924 --> 00:39:54,186
And now it's in print.
646
00:39:54,392 --> 00:39:55,222
Forever.
647
00:39:55,526 --> 00:39:57,729
Look, I don't know if you noticed lately,
648
00:39:57,729 --> 00:39:59,060
but we are the shit around here.
649
00:39:59,297 --> 00:40:02,926
Gods, man. And I've worked way too hard
to let you throw that away
650
00:40:03,268 --> 00:40:05,600
by hanging with some
lunatic-fringe fairy-queen.
651
00:40:06,204 --> 00:40:07,967
He's turning you into a joke, Levi.
652
00:40:08,439 --> 00:40:09,701
And you don't even see it.
653
00:40:10,008 --> 00:40:11,236
You give him too much credit.
654
00:40:11,409 --> 00:40:12,933
No, the credit's all yours!
655
00:40:15,179 --> 00:40:16,441
Stay away from him, man.
656
00:40:18,283 --> 00:40:19,443
Is that a threat?
657
00:40:31,496 --> 00:40:32,793
What are you looking for?
658
00:40:33,765 --> 00:40:35,198
A little peace and quiet.
659
00:40:44,709 --> 00:40:46,006
This was her favorite.
660
00:40:46,678 --> 00:40:48,043
It's beautifully crafted.
661
00:40:48,413 --> 00:40:49,812
Look at the beading detail.
662
00:40:50,515 --> 00:40:51,743
A timeless fashion.
663
00:40:52,116 --> 00:40:53,208
Exquisite...
664
00:40:55,787 --> 00:40:57,687
Why are you looking through
Mom's old dresses?
665
00:40:59,524 --> 00:41:00,991
Don't you have
a tiara to polish?
666
00:41:08,599 --> 00:41:09,224
Hey, Levi.
667
00:41:09,701 --> 00:41:12,465
I just wanted to say thanks again,
for aiding me with my article.
668
00:41:13,104 --> 00:41:15,766
I thought you might like some of Hank's
photos of you at soccer practice...
669
00:41:15,940 --> 00:41:17,134
Uh, hello?
670
00:41:17,709 --> 00:41:19,199
Thanks, but I'll pass.
671
00:42:17,435 --> 00:42:19,027
Chance do you have a--
672
00:42:19,470 --> 00:42:20,698
Close the door!
673
00:42:30,915 --> 00:42:31,882
It's not bad...
674
00:42:39,023 --> 00:42:41,014
Have you ever heard of lip-liner?
675
00:42:41,526 --> 00:42:42,584
Hello?!
676
00:42:42,794 --> 00:42:45,160
If Cyndi Lauper can manage it,
so can you.
677
00:42:57,842 --> 00:42:59,742
Your foundation is a tad uneven.
678
00:43:03,247 --> 00:43:05,181
Is this your outfit for school tomorrow?
679
00:43:09,387 --> 00:43:10,786
You're going to enter?
680
00:43:11,689 --> 00:43:13,748
Teenagers get to do all the fun stuff.
681
00:43:14,892 --> 00:43:17,884
I don't know how much fun it'll be
after ten minutes in heels.
682
00:43:18,696 --> 00:43:20,459
I can show you wear to put band-aids.
683
00:43:20,731 --> 00:43:22,460
They'll keep your feet from blistering.
684
00:43:23,968 --> 00:43:26,027
Hey, don't tell anyone about this.
685
00:43:26,437 --> 00:43:27,836
Especially not Sir.
686
00:43:28,706 --> 00:43:30,230
If anyone I know sees me like this,
687
00:43:30,475 --> 00:43:31,601
I am done for.
688
00:43:33,544 --> 00:43:35,307
No matter how well I pull it off.
689
00:43:41,052 --> 00:43:43,020
Jesus and Mary
and our Commander-in-Chief,
690
00:43:43,020 --> 00:43:43,821
Ronald Reagan!
691
00:43:43,821 --> 00:43:45,152
What the hell are we doing here?!
692
00:43:49,594 --> 00:43:50,652
Is that your mother's dress?
693
00:43:51,129 --> 00:43:52,391
It shouldn't go to waste.
694
00:43:52,697 --> 00:43:53,925
I did his make-up.
695
00:43:54,432 --> 00:43:56,866
Well, you did a very nice job, Honey...
696
00:43:59,103 --> 00:44:00,365
Okay.
697
00:44:04,542 --> 00:44:06,373
He wanted to spare your feelings,
698
00:44:06,744 --> 00:44:08,405
but truthfully, I could tell...
699
00:44:09,247 --> 00:44:10,976
he thinks your eye shadow is too dark.
700
00:44:12,583 --> 00:44:15,108
Doesn't anyone ever knock in this house?
701
00:45:30,461 --> 00:45:33,123
The Debbie-Gibson-Red
is definitely your color.
702
00:45:38,336 --> 00:45:39,735
Stay calm.
703
00:45:39,904 --> 00:45:44,475
Sasha means well, he thinks he can find for
every queen her name and 'inner song'.
704
00:45:44,475 --> 00:45:46,306
It only should take a second.
705
00:45:47,278 --> 00:45:48,370
Pepper Madison.
706
00:45:48,646 --> 00:45:49,578
Dancing Queen!
707
00:45:50,381 --> 00:45:51,313
Are you sure?
708
00:45:51,449 --> 00:45:54,418
Listen to me Pepper,
if you sing 'Dancing Queen'
709
00:45:54,418 --> 00:45:56,648
you will be the star performer of the night.
710
00:45:57,722 --> 00:45:59,519
I might even make you a regular.
711
00:46:02,059 --> 00:46:03,628
I didn't practice Dancing Queen.
712
00:46:03,628 --> 00:46:07,086
Don't worry, Sasha means well,
but he's a little bit funny in the head.
713
00:46:07,498 --> 00:46:10,058
He always want us to sing 'Dancing Queen.'
714
00:46:12,036 --> 00:46:13,060
Are you nervous?
715
00:46:13,971 --> 00:46:14,733
A little bit...
716
00:46:14,972 --> 00:46:15,640
Yeah...
717
00:46:15,640 --> 00:46:17,073
Okay, a lotta bit.
718
00:46:17,541 --> 00:46:18,943
Don't worry. Butterflies are good.
719
00:46:18,943 --> 00:46:20,069
But think about this:
720
00:46:20,511 --> 00:46:22,206
failure is not an option.
721
00:46:22,747 --> 00:46:25,750
And whatever you do tonight
don't turn on the mic.
722
00:46:25,750 --> 00:46:26,614
Ok?
723
00:46:26,851 --> 00:46:28,648
But you'll be a star tonight.
724
00:47:16,867 --> 00:47:19,203
Claire Vuoyant everyone...
725
00:47:19,203 --> 00:47:20,500
always hard to top.
726
00:47:20,938 --> 00:47:25,209
In fact, I have it on good authority
she has her ass tattooed:
727
00:47:25,209 --> 00:47:26,733
'No Entry.'
728
00:47:27,211 --> 00:47:28,940
'For eight-inches and under.'
729
00:47:30,381 --> 00:47:32,941
Okay, let's keep this train-wreck
of a night going.
730
00:47:33,484 --> 00:47:36,253
Next up is a first-timer, so ladies,
731
00:47:36,253 --> 00:47:38,881
keep those beer bottles in your
mouths where they belong.
732
00:47:39,423 --> 00:47:42,881
Here she is: Lucky Chance!
733
00:48:30,508 --> 00:48:32,840
I was bom to run
734
00:48:33,344 --> 00:48:35,403
I was born to dream
735
00:48:35,946 --> 00:48:38,380
Craziest boy you've ever seen
736
00:48:39,016 --> 00:48:41,348
I've gotta do it my way
737
00:48:42,420 --> 00:48:44,718
Or no way at all
738
00:48:45,589 --> 00:48:48,217
And I was here to please
739
00:48:48,793 --> 00:48:50,658
I'm even on my knees
740
00:48:50,861 --> 00:48:53,625
Making love to whoever I please
741
00:48:54,031 --> 00:48:56,693
I've gotta do it my way
742
00:48:57,301 --> 00:48:59,633
Or no way at all
743
00:49:00,337 --> 00:49:02,567
And then you came around
744
00:49:02,873 --> 00:49:04,704
Tryin' to tie me down
745
00:49:05,075 --> 00:49:06,906
I was such a clown
746
00:49:07,478 --> 00:49:09,878
You had to have it your way
747
00:49:10,681 --> 00:49:12,876
Or no way at all
748
00:49:14,485 --> 00:49:17,477
Why don't you turn me loose
749
00:49:18,255 --> 00:49:21,418
Turn me loose, turn me loose
750
00:49:22,960 --> 00:49:25,258
I've gotta have it my way
751
00:49:27,097 --> 00:49:29,429
Or no way at all
752
00:49:30,468 --> 00:49:33,562
Why don't you turn me loose
753
00:49:34,104 --> 00:49:37,699
Turn me loose, turn me loose
754
00:49:38,843 --> 00:49:41,403
I've gotta have it my way
755
00:49:42,880 --> 00:49:45,280
Or no way at all
756
00:49:47,384 --> 00:49:49,787
And I'm here to please
757
00:49:49,787 --> 00:49:51,922
Even on my knees
758
00:49:51,922 --> 00:49:54,823
Making love to whoever I please
759
00:49:55,359 --> 00:49:58,021
I've gotta do it my way
760
00:50:49,413 --> 00:50:50,402
What's going on?
761
00:50:52,583 --> 00:50:54,574
The Split Infinitives have officially...
762
00:50:55,686 --> 00:50:56,414
split.
763
00:50:58,088 --> 00:50:59,817
Grammar police cracking down?
764
00:51:01,559 --> 00:51:03,584
Look Chance, I don't mean
to be a jerk or nothing, but--
765
00:51:03,894 --> 00:51:05,919
But you just decided to be one anyway.
766
00:51:09,300 --> 00:51:11,268
Listen, I can't really hang with you anymore.
767
00:51:12,503 --> 00:51:15,005
My dad's being a hard-ass about football,
768
00:51:15,005 --> 00:51:17,166
and concentrating on getting a scholarship.
769
00:51:18,809 --> 00:51:20,367
That's why he made you quit the band?
770
00:51:22,546 --> 00:51:25,014
What happened to your whole
'music is my life' mantra?
771
00:51:26,083 --> 00:51:26,742
Well,
772
00:51:27,551 --> 00:51:29,815
it's like you said, we're...
What was it?
773
00:51:30,287 --> 00:51:31,083
Pedicular?
774
00:51:32,723 --> 00:51:33,883
So, no big loss.
775
00:51:34,825 --> 00:51:37,794
I don't know a meteor could hit the earth,
causing you to get better.
776
00:51:38,629 --> 00:51:40,119
I think I saw it once in an Ed Wood film.
777
00:51:43,901 --> 00:51:45,766
I know the real reason you
don't want to be seen with me.
778
00:51:47,004 --> 00:51:47,993
It's not what you think.
779
00:51:48,672 --> 00:51:49,866
I don't care that you dig guys.
780
00:51:52,309 --> 00:51:53,606
I believe that.
781
00:51:54,812 --> 00:51:56,712
But you do care
if other people think you do...
782
00:51:58,148 --> 00:51:59,581
by way of association.
783
00:52:01,585 --> 00:52:03,746
I never realized Brad had
so much sway over you.
784
00:52:05,255 --> 00:52:06,824
Usually the drummer is the most expendable.
785
00:52:06,824 --> 00:52:08,525
Look, I don't expect you to get it.
786
00:52:08,525 --> 00:52:09,787
There's a news flash.
787
00:52:09,960 --> 00:52:11,689
You don't expect me to get much, do you?
788
00:52:12,363 --> 00:52:14,763
Continually underestimating me
for some unknown reason.
789
00:52:17,234 --> 00:52:18,936
You're not as complicated
as you think you are.
790
00:52:18,936 --> 00:52:19,925
How the hell would you know?
791
00:52:20,571 --> 00:52:21,799
I'm a teenager, too.
792
00:52:22,906 --> 00:52:24,669
And infinitely
more complicated than you.
793
00:52:26,110 --> 00:52:26,940
Is that so?
794
00:52:29,580 --> 00:52:31,571
I don't see any dresses in your closet.
795
00:52:35,953 --> 00:52:36,920
It's okay.
796
00:52:38,288 --> 00:52:39,983
Guys like you are never friends
with the likes of me.
797
00:52:41,158 --> 00:52:43,058
So in that regard,
you turned out true to form.
798
00:52:46,030 --> 00:52:46,894
Ouch.
799
00:52:50,801 --> 00:52:52,860
Someday, you're gonna have
to stand up to people.
800
00:52:54,338 --> 00:52:55,327
People like Brad...
801
00:52:56,774 --> 00:52:57,604
like your father.
802
00:52:59,443 --> 00:53:01,274
Eventually maybe even yourself.
803
00:53:21,031 --> 00:53:24,000
So, how's your
revenge-on-Brad plan coming?
804
00:53:24,735 --> 00:53:25,929
Yeah, what you got?
805
00:53:26,970 --> 00:53:27,902
A headache.
806
00:53:28,605 --> 00:53:30,340
Besides, I think
he's forgotten about me.
807
00:53:30,340 --> 00:53:32,035
I'm off his radar.
808
00:53:34,812 --> 00:53:35,710
Jerk!
809
00:53:36,046 --> 00:53:36,671
Hey!
810
00:53:37,114 --> 00:53:37,978
Look, Whoopi,
811
00:53:38,582 --> 00:53:41,551
it ain't my fault his big fat face
got in the way, okay?
812
00:53:42,586 --> 00:53:43,746
Hey! Marquis...
813
00:53:44,021 --> 00:53:45,181
next time, duck.
814
00:53:45,723 --> 00:53:46,747
Like the chicken you are.
815
00:53:47,291 --> 00:53:48,588
That makes no sense.
816
00:53:49,259 --> 00:53:50,794
On a pure poultry level.
817
00:53:50,794 --> 00:53:52,129
Hey! Jimmy Olsen,
818
00:53:52,129 --> 00:53:53,363
no one's talking to you.
819
00:53:53,363 --> 00:53:54,798
Why are you so angry all the time?
820
00:53:54,798 --> 00:53:56,129
What did I even do to you?
821
00:53:56,767 --> 00:53:58,200
Invaded my school.
822
00:53:58,836 --> 00:54:01,862
I mean, your presence alone is enough
to make me wanna puke.
823
00:54:02,005 --> 00:54:03,336
Don't you get it man?
824
00:54:04,174 --> 00:54:05,334
You don't belong here.
825
00:54:08,545 --> 00:54:09,739
So, leave.
826
00:54:10,881 --> 00:54:12,872
Fairy Academy is back in the states.
827
00:54:13,584 --> 00:54:14,949
They're waiting for you.
828
00:54:16,520 --> 00:54:17,578
Let's go, man.
829
00:54:21,325 --> 00:54:23,520
Forget about it man,
well beat him up tomorrow.
830
00:54:29,466 --> 00:54:32,867
So, what was that all about being
'off his radar'?
831
00:54:33,837 --> 00:54:35,395
A man can't go on like this.
832
00:54:35,672 --> 00:54:36,900
Or you, even.
833
00:54:38,008 --> 00:54:39,168
Do something!
834
00:54:40,511 --> 00:54:42,479
I know why he's so angry all the time.
835
00:54:46,483 --> 00:54:47,718
This plan is unwise.
836
00:54:47,718 --> 00:54:49,049
Not to mention, uncouth.
837
00:54:49,953 --> 00:54:52,217
It's high-risk, I agree.
838
00:54:52,689 --> 00:54:54,623
Grow some balls! The both of you.
839
00:54:54,858 --> 00:54:57,895
And stop talking like
a forty-year-old British fop.
840
00:54:57,895 --> 00:54:58,953
It's bizarro.
841
00:55:01,031 --> 00:55:02,396
If I do like this--
842
00:55:03,767 --> 00:55:04,392
Abort.
843
00:55:05,569 --> 00:55:06,661
and if I do this-
844
00:55:07,771 --> 00:55:10,073
Then the abort is off and we're back on.
845
00:55:10,073 --> 00:55:12,303
But then, if I do...
846
00:55:12,776 --> 00:55:15,244
Mr. Samsonite, shut it!
847
00:55:39,169 --> 00:55:42,434
Okay, Air Craft Carrier Smelker
has passed.
848
00:55:42,873 --> 00:55:43,532
C'mon!
849
00:55:59,323 --> 00:56:01,086
I need to see the nurse!
850
00:56:02,059 --> 00:56:03,260
I'm dying.
851
00:56:03,260 --> 00:56:04,727
Not before I get a petition form.
852
00:56:05,195 --> 00:56:09,495
The food at this institution is not fit for
sub-species consumption, let alone humans.
853
00:56:10,033 --> 00:56:12,866
One at a time, boys, please I am alone here.
854
00:56:15,505 --> 00:56:16,665
Are you okay?
855
00:56:18,709 --> 00:56:19,767
Oh my God!
856
00:56:23,847 --> 00:56:24,905
What's wrong with him?
857
00:56:25,182 --> 00:56:26,984
You know, I'm certainly no medical expert, but...
858
00:56:26,984 --> 00:56:28,849
...from the looks of it...
859
00:56:29,519 --> 00:56:31,214
I'd say... He's dying!
860
00:56:43,500 --> 00:56:44,701
It's moved from his throat!
861
00:56:44,701 --> 00:56:45,793
Maybe it's a parasite.
862
00:56:46,403 --> 00:56:47,871
I'm calling the nurse!
863
00:56:47,871 --> 00:56:48,997
Don't leave me!
864
00:56:49,206 --> 00:56:50,332
Not yet.
865
00:57:10,727 --> 00:57:12,319
Stay away from the light...
866
00:57:12,829 --> 00:57:14,421
Stay away from the light...
867
00:57:20,003 --> 00:57:21,402
I think he's trying to confess.
868
00:57:21,872 --> 00:57:24,033
Are you properly trained
in the giving of last rites?
869
00:57:24,641 --> 00:57:25,699
I don't know.
870
00:57:25,776 --> 00:57:27,835
Oh no! Don't go, Hank!..
871
00:57:28,078 --> 00:57:28,976
Don't go...
872
00:57:29,146 --> 00:57:32,516
GO!..He was so sweet--
873
00:57:32,516 --> 00:57:33,744
I'm okay...
874
00:57:35,619 --> 00:57:37,018
What's happening here?
875
00:57:37,321 --> 00:57:38,151
Allergies.
876
00:57:38,355 --> 00:57:39,515
They come and go.
877
00:57:40,624 --> 00:57:42,524
You were very comforting, though.
878
00:57:42,926 --> 00:57:46,327
Oh...you know...and on second thought...
the food is just fine.
879
00:57:53,670 --> 00:57:54,967
You got the combination?
880
00:57:55,238 --> 00:57:57,763
She might smell,
but at least her files are organized.
881
00:57:57,941 --> 00:57:59,533
So, when do we do it?
882
00:57:59,776 --> 00:58:00,844
After school.
883
00:58:00,844 --> 00:58:03,711
We just broke into
the Vice Principal's office!
884
00:58:03,847 --> 00:58:06,145
Knowing Smelker, she could parlay
that into my beheading.
885
00:58:06,450 --> 00:58:09,052
Dammit Marquis,
don't wussy out on me.
886
00:58:09,052 --> 00:58:11,520
Or do you like getting smacked
in the face by balls?
887
00:58:12,389 --> 00:58:13,413
Don't answer that.
888
00:58:13,890 --> 00:58:18,293
All I'm trying to say, if you want Brad to keep
wailing on you, then fine--
889
00:58:21,531 --> 00:58:22,463
Wait, wait, NO!
890
00:58:23,266 --> 00:58:25,860
Let me just see what's in his locker first,
then I'll decide.
891
00:58:33,410 --> 00:58:34,809
Someone loves himself.
892
00:58:35,612 --> 00:58:37,011
Hey! Wait up!
893
00:58:43,954 --> 00:58:44,921
What's that?
894
00:58:47,491 --> 00:58:49,482
The holy grail...
895
00:58:50,827 --> 00:58:51,725
'Roid Rage.
896
00:58:52,062 --> 00:58:54,155
He's been on it
for at least a year.
897
00:58:54,398 --> 00:58:55,660
How do you know all this?
898
00:58:56,066 --> 00:58:58,159
Toni Durazo, his fetching girlfriend,
899
00:58:58,602 --> 00:58:59,899
sits next to me in photo.
900
00:59:01,004 --> 00:59:02,806
Her best friend Rachel is behind me
901
00:59:02,806 --> 00:59:04,569
and when notes pass, I'm the go-between.
902
00:59:04,875 --> 00:59:06,706
Sometimes they don't bother to fold them.
903
00:59:06,910 --> 00:59:08,078
And this one time, Toni asked me--
904
00:59:08,078 --> 00:59:09,375
Okay, got it.
905
00:59:09,713 --> 00:59:12,375
You can read and you've got
a hard-on for Toni.
906
00:59:12,549 --> 00:59:13,948
So fascinating!
907
00:59:14,918 --> 00:59:16,647
What do we do now exactly?
908
00:59:16,987 --> 00:59:18,181
What do we do now?
909
00:59:19,723 --> 00:59:21,782
A student taking steroids...
910
00:59:22,359 --> 00:59:23,553
We blow the whistle.
911
00:59:24,227 --> 00:59:27,196
Brad gets caught red handed and BOOM!
912
00:59:27,297 --> 00:59:29,499
Expulsion. Poof!
913
00:59:29,499 --> 00:59:32,434
Gone from Brickland like
a bad case of ringworm.
914
00:59:32,803 --> 00:59:35,499
It's so perfect,
it makes me want to cry.
915
00:59:36,473 --> 00:59:37,337
How?...
916
00:59:38,909 --> 00:59:40,433
Does it go down, I mean?
917
00:59:41,044 --> 00:59:42,534
Go down?
918
00:59:45,082 --> 00:59:46,413
An anonymous tip.
919
00:59:48,018 --> 00:59:50,087
Seize the day, Chance.
920
00:59:50,087 --> 00:59:53,056
Rid our society from
pond-scum like Brad Harden.
921
00:59:53,256 --> 00:59:55,926
Opportunities like this
don't come along every day.
922
00:59:55,926 --> 00:59:59,862
So remember,
it's survival of the smartest.
923
01:00:05,302 --> 01:00:07,270
I know where you live, Dorkus.
924
01:00:09,239 --> 01:00:10,706
Hey, lighten up.
925
01:00:10,874 --> 01:00:12,637
I don't really think you're a dorkus.
926
01:00:13,176 --> 01:00:14,108
I know you don't.
927
01:00:15,112 --> 01:00:18,014
Why is it you so often
forget my superior intellect...
928
01:00:18,014 --> 01:00:21,251
and nascent ability to process your rudimentary
attempts at sarcasm?--
929
01:00:21,251 --> 01:00:24,015
Shut it! Before I
purposely drive into a pole.
930
01:00:27,023 --> 01:00:28,513
So, um...
931
01:00:30,694 --> 01:00:32,423
...when did you know you were...
932
01:00:34,164 --> 01:00:35,062
...you know...
933
01:00:36,800 --> 01:00:38,062
A homosexual?
934
01:00:39,336 --> 01:00:41,827
I don't know. When did you know
you were a breeder?
935
01:00:42,038 --> 01:00:44,268
Still not completely sure if I am.
936
01:00:44,774 --> 01:00:48,005
I've set for eighteen to twenty-three
to be my 'experimental years.'
937
01:00:48,245 --> 01:00:49,269
I have a plan.
938
01:00:51,381 --> 01:00:52,279
Four.
939
01:00:53,984 --> 01:00:55,076
Four what?
940
01:00:55,852 --> 01:00:57,114
When I was four,
941
01:00:58,588 --> 01:01:01,921
my dear-departed mother took me to a
production of The Nutcracker.
942
01:01:02,259 --> 01:01:05,990
It was colorful, and dramatic
and the music was great.
943
01:01:06,496 --> 01:01:09,056
But just one thing held my attention
above everything else:
944
01:01:10,800 --> 01:01:11,926
a dancer.
945
01:01:13,270 --> 01:01:14,202
Male.
946
01:01:15,172 --> 01:01:16,935
Shirtless through the entire play.
947
01:01:19,709 --> 01:01:21,870
I couldn't stop looking at him.
948
01:01:23,747 --> 01:01:26,841
Of course, I didn't really understand
why then, but...
949
01:01:29,119 --> 01:01:30,279
I do now.
950
01:01:31,788 --> 01:01:33,221
Very touching, Marquis.
951
01:01:33,356 --> 01:01:35,221
Excuse me while I vomit.
952
01:01:38,161 --> 01:01:39,829
Look, I don't care if you're gay,
953
01:01:39,829 --> 01:01:41,865
but most people in school do.
954
01:01:41,865 --> 01:01:42,354
So...
955
01:01:44,367 --> 01:01:45,664
It's just...
956
01:01:46,336 --> 01:01:48,702
If that alone
makes you such a huge target,
957
01:01:49,406 --> 01:01:52,864
why do you give 'em more ammo
by acting and dressing the way you do?
958
01:01:54,811 --> 01:01:55,869
Well,
959
01:01:56,313 --> 01:01:59,649
if you have the choice between being
ostracized for wearing a weird hat,
960
01:01:59,649 --> 01:02:00,411
or being gay...
961
01:02:01,751 --> 01:02:03,048
which one would you pick?
962
01:02:05,288 --> 01:02:06,448
Thanks for the ride home.
963
01:02:08,658 --> 01:02:10,285
And thanks for looking out for me.
964
01:02:28,645 --> 01:02:30,738
I loved your football pictures in the paper.
965
01:02:32,315 --> 01:02:33,373
You did?
966
01:02:36,720 --> 01:02:37,516
Thanks.
967
01:02:40,991 --> 01:02:42,288
Can I see?
968
01:02:42,959 --> 01:02:43,721
Umm...
969
01:02:48,164 --> 01:02:49,222
Sure.
970
01:02:51,568 --> 01:02:52,796
These are great.
971
01:02:53,336 --> 01:02:55,065
Who is this? Your sister?
972
01:02:55,805 --> 01:02:57,102
Not exactly.
973
01:03:02,679 --> 01:03:03,646
Is that...
974
01:03:05,315 --> 01:03:06,680
...Chance?
975
01:03:09,719 --> 01:03:10,754
Yeah!
976
01:03:10,754 --> 01:03:16,359
We went to this club in the city and he
performed with a bunch of other drag queens.
977
01:03:16,359 --> 01:03:17,883
It was great!
978
01:03:18,194 --> 01:03:19,752
He was awesome!
979
01:03:22,699 --> 01:03:24,997
Did you take these for the school paper?
980
01:03:26,703 --> 01:03:29,263
No. I'm just developing them for Chance.
981
01:03:29,839 --> 01:03:30,703
I mean...
982
01:03:31,207 --> 01:03:33,767
I don't think he really wants
anyone to know...
983
01:03:33,910 --> 01:03:34,672
you know?
984
01:03:34,911 --> 01:03:35,605
Oh,
985
01:03:36,346 --> 01:03:37,472
sure, yeah.
986
01:03:37,814 --> 01:03:39,679
His secret's safe with me.
987
01:03:41,785 --> 01:03:44,413
Umm... Hey, do you have
988
01:03:44,487 --> 01:03:47,354
any high-gloss paper I could borrow?
989
01:03:47,657 --> 01:03:48,681
Sure...
990
01:03:49,592 --> 01:03:52,584
Oh, I left it in the classroom.
991
01:03:56,766 --> 01:03:57,733
I'll go get it.
992
01:04:14,017 --> 01:04:18,521
All I know is I didn't risk my life
sneaking into Smelt-her's office
993
01:04:18,521 --> 01:04:20,955
to get information you're not
even gonna use now!
994
01:04:21,291 --> 01:04:22,053
But...
995
01:04:22,158 --> 01:04:24,594
I continue to appreciate the
creation of the plan
996
01:04:24,594 --> 01:04:26,425
and its stealth-like deployment.
997
01:04:29,332 --> 01:04:31,732
Yours is a leadership even my
father would hold dear.
998
01:04:32,202 --> 01:04:34,864
But I hate to point out the fact that you
didn't actually risk your life.
999
01:04:36,506 --> 01:04:38,804
Have you ever been in that office?
1000
01:04:39,342 --> 01:04:42,402
It took everything in me
to avoid asphyxiation.
1001
01:04:44,914 --> 01:04:45,881
Point taken.
1002
01:04:46,883 --> 01:04:48,976
So you're just gonna let Brad
keep beating on you?
1003
01:04:49,686 --> 01:04:50,846
UHH! Ahh!
1004
01:04:51,688 --> 01:04:53,723
Look, I've been
in this situation before...
1005
01:04:53,723 --> 01:04:57,215
eventually Brad will get tired of me and
move on to helpless freshmen.
1006
01:04:57,660 --> 01:04:58,592
Puppies.
1007
01:04:59,095 --> 01:05:00,163
And speaking frankly...
1008
01:05:00,163 --> 01:05:01,431
tattletale-ing is beneath me.
1009
01:05:01,431 --> 01:05:02,591
And you for that matter.
1010
01:05:02,732 --> 01:05:04,996
He's not going to move on, Chance.
1011
01:05:05,301 --> 01:05:06,503
I know his kind.
1012
01:05:06,503 --> 01:05:10,269
Brad is like a cat toying with a mouse
before going in for the kill.
1013
01:05:14,277 --> 01:05:17,414
You act like
none of this stuff bothers you,
1014
01:05:17,414 --> 01:05:18,642
like it's a nuisance.
1015
01:05:19,315 --> 01:05:20,917
You talk a good game.
1016
01:05:20,917 --> 01:05:25,217
It even made me think that you were
strong...like everyone underestimates you.
1017
01:05:25,388 --> 01:05:27,657
But that's all it is:
1018
01:05:27,657 --> 01:05:28,646
talk.
1019
01:05:29,092 --> 01:05:30,616
You're a coward, Chance.
1020
01:05:31,494 --> 01:05:32,518
A mouse.
1021
01:05:33,096 --> 01:05:34,427
Brad's mouse.
1022
01:05:37,634 --> 01:05:39,033
Marquis, you're out!
1023
01:05:40,870 --> 01:05:42,030
Dear students,
1024
01:05:42,272 --> 01:05:45,708
do not forget
your essays for next Monday.
1025
01:05:46,910 --> 01:05:51,006
You should write 500 words,
not less,
1026
01:05:51,281 --> 01:05:54,250
and I have a
very nice reading task for you:
1027
01:05:54,717 --> 01:05:57,515
you should read Act One of Macbeth,
1028
01:05:57,754 --> 01:06:00,917
one of Shakespeare's greatest tragedies.
1029
01:06:01,391 --> 01:06:04,087
There is also a reminder
on the blackboard,
1030
01:06:04,394 --> 01:06:07,090
you do not use cliff notes, okay?
1031
01:06:08,231 --> 01:06:09,994
Time for literature now...
1032
01:06:11,234 --> 01:06:14,032
this book: The Count of Monte Cristo
1033
01:06:14,437 --> 01:06:18,737
written by Alexandre Dumas...
1034
01:06:19,142 --> 01:06:22,942
Oh man, Boy-George is so going to wish he
never stepped foot in this school.
1035
01:06:39,729 --> 01:06:40,627
Hey Cadet,...
1036
01:06:41,731 --> 01:06:42,698
come on in here.
1037
01:06:44,601 --> 01:06:45,761
I thought we'd do this together.
1038
01:06:46,736 --> 01:06:47,725
Hai!
1039
01:07:10,026 --> 01:07:11,425
You gotta be tough, Chance.
1040
01:07:12,061 --> 01:07:13,653
It's the only way
to survive in this life.
1041
01:07:14,230 --> 01:07:16,391
Did it ever occur to you that maybe
I already am tough?
1042
01:07:16,633 --> 01:07:18,401
What? No, that's not what I meant-
1043
01:07:18,401 --> 01:07:19,095
I didn't think so.
1044
01:07:19,469 --> 01:07:20,570
But then again, why would you
1045
01:07:20,570 --> 01:07:23,606
when you've spent your entire adult life
being trained to discern that
1046
01:07:23,606 --> 01:07:25,437
which is only directly in
front of your face?
1047
01:07:25,909 --> 01:07:28,411
So when you look at me,
all you see is everything you aren't.
1048
01:07:28,411 --> 01:07:29,579
And would never want to be.
1049
01:07:29,579 --> 01:07:30,841
You don't see strength...
1050
01:07:31,347 --> 01:07:33,983
just cowardice and, let's face it, a big fag!
1051
01:07:33,983 --> 01:07:35,118
So if you'll excuse me,
1052
01:07:35,118 --> 01:07:37,177
I have a field of daisies
to go frolic through!
1053
01:07:38,021 --> 01:07:40,455
What did I tell you about using
that word in this house!
1054
01:07:48,464 --> 01:07:51,831
Hey, my girlfriend needs some lipstick,
can you help her out?
1055
01:09:29,599 --> 01:09:31,430
Someone must have swiped it.
1056
01:09:32,135 --> 01:09:33,569
Perceptive beyond belief.
1057
01:09:33,569 --> 01:09:34,637
It's impossible.
1058
01:09:34,637 --> 01:09:35,865
I was extra careful.
1059
01:09:35,972 --> 01:09:38,463
No one even saw them, except for...
1060
01:09:41,044 --> 01:09:42,011
Oh...
1061
01:09:43,246 --> 01:09:44,213
Oh...
1062
01:09:46,382 --> 01:09:48,282
Before you say anything,
1063
01:09:48,918 --> 01:09:51,113
just remember, she's very fetching.
1064
01:09:51,654 --> 01:09:53,690
And I'm a teenager in high school
1065
01:09:53,690 --> 01:09:55,089
who's not having sex.
1066
01:09:56,092 --> 01:09:58,754
You showed these to Toni Durazo?!
1067
01:10:00,430 --> 01:10:02,565
She's Brad's girlfriend...
1068
01:10:02,565 --> 01:10:04,100
you idiot!
1069
01:10:04,100 --> 01:10:06,261
What are you,
sniffing on photo chemicals again?!
1070
01:10:09,138 --> 01:10:11,163
It's like a voodoo spell, I think...
1071
01:10:13,142 --> 01:10:14,544
Look on the positive side,
1072
01:10:14,544 --> 01:10:17,172
it's definitely one of my better shots.
1073
01:10:17,947 --> 01:10:19,005
Ow!
1074
01:10:21,818 --> 01:10:23,080
It'll blow over.
1075
01:10:23,820 --> 01:10:26,050
I don't know if you've noticed,
but this is high school.
1076
01:10:26,422 --> 01:10:27,724
Things don't 'blow over'.
1077
01:10:27,724 --> 01:10:29,555
They stay with you forever...
1078
01:10:30,626 --> 01:10:31,991
like low self-esteem.
1079
01:10:34,564 --> 01:10:37,433
May I take this opportunity
to mention that
1080
01:10:37,433 --> 01:10:40,869
an anonymous phone call is still
very much an option.
1081
01:10:41,738 --> 01:10:43,773
The cat is no longer toying,
1082
01:10:43,773 --> 01:10:45,934
and its teeth are
in the mouse's neck.
1083
01:10:46,375 --> 01:10:48,172
It's not how I fight my battles.
1084
01:10:52,915 --> 01:10:54,712
This isn't just going to go away....
1085
01:11:07,630 --> 01:11:11,464
C'mon Marquis, English Lit rates
at least a ballroom gown, Man.
1086
01:11:16,839 --> 01:11:20,206
So exactly how mad does your mom get
when you steal her bras, huh?
1087
01:11:22,445 --> 01:11:24,046
...Or her tits, for that matter.
1088
01:11:24,046 --> 01:11:25,343
Shut up!
1089
01:11:38,027 --> 01:11:40,495
You do this sort of thing often?
1090
01:11:42,165 --> 01:11:43,257
One time.
1091
01:11:44,534 --> 01:11:46,661
That's all it usually takes.
1092
01:11:48,938 --> 01:11:50,769
They can't handle this, you know...
1093
01:11:51,741 --> 01:11:53,072
The students here.
1094
01:11:53,910 --> 01:11:58,847
They tolerate the misfits among them,
but if you rub their faces in it...
1095
01:12:00,082 --> 01:12:04,041
That's too much for the hormone-engorged
teenager to deal with.
1096
01:12:06,923 --> 01:12:08,151
So now what?
1097
01:12:09,559 --> 01:12:12,153
You need to find a way for
them to handle it.
1098
01:12:12,695 --> 01:12:13,896
Otherwise,
1099
01:12:13,896 --> 01:12:16,729
I don't really see a future for you
here at Brickland.
1100
01:12:19,502 --> 01:12:22,027
This will excuse you
for the rest of the week.
1101
01:12:25,975 --> 01:12:28,500
Use the time to think.
1102
01:12:31,080 --> 01:12:32,877
We'll have the flyers removed.
1103
01:12:40,923 --> 01:12:42,151
Where's your brother?
1104
01:12:42,291 --> 01:12:44,020
Said he's not feeling well.
1105
01:12:55,905 --> 01:12:56,803
Hi.
1106
01:12:56,939 --> 01:12:58,873
Is, uh, Chance around?
1107
01:12:59,141 --> 01:13:00,108
Who are you?
1108
01:13:00,309 --> 01:13:02,038
He's Chance's ex-friend from next door.
1109
01:13:02,712 --> 01:13:04,043
He has his own band.
1110
01:13:05,147 --> 01:13:06,171
Chance is upstairs.
1111
01:13:20,596 --> 01:13:22,154
Here to revel in Brad's victory?
1112
01:13:23,165 --> 01:13:24,496
Kind of a tough day, huh?
1113
01:13:26,002 --> 01:13:27,603
Why? Were you
tarred and feathered, too?
1114
01:13:27,603 --> 01:13:28,695
I hadn't noticed.
1115
01:13:30,473 --> 01:13:31,462
Look,
1116
01:13:32,108 --> 01:13:34,508
I'm the first to admit
Brad crossed a line.
1117
01:13:35,945 --> 01:13:37,378
What he did was...
1118
01:13:38,681 --> 01:13:40,512
...was expose me for who I really am?
1119
01:13:42,051 --> 01:13:43,450
Maybe I should be thanking him.
1120
01:13:44,320 --> 01:13:45,354
This might surprise you, Levi,
1121
01:13:45,354 --> 01:13:47,288
but I'm not embarassed
about what happened.
1122
01:13:48,291 --> 01:13:49,417
If you say so.
1123
01:13:50,426 --> 01:13:54,362
It just sort of looked that way when you
were ripping that flyer off the wall.
1124
01:13:55,665 --> 01:13:58,463
So now everyone thinks I'm ashamed of
the fact that I dressed in drag.
1125
01:14:00,102 --> 01:14:01,865
Like it was some horrible secret.
1126
01:14:02,772 --> 01:14:05,541
When the truth is, the guy
who goes to school every day...
1127
01:14:05,541 --> 01:14:06,872
he's the lie.
1128
01:14:09,011 --> 01:14:11,878
Why do I let it be okay for people
to think less of me?
1129
01:14:13,683 --> 01:14:17,175
...for my friends just to decide they
no longer wanna be my friends.
1130
01:14:21,057 --> 01:14:23,355
Man, I take all of it..
1131
01:14:24,193 --> 01:14:26,423
and I try to rise above it.
1132
01:14:28,197 --> 01:14:31,189
But I don't think you're supposed
to do that in high school.
1133
01:14:31,767 --> 01:14:34,497
Nothing heroic ever came of 'rising above it.'
1134
01:14:37,840 --> 01:14:39,330
Hey! What do you write in that?
1135
01:14:40,409 --> 01:14:42,274
My brilliant and insightful thoughts.
1136
01:14:45,181 --> 01:14:47,479
And some poems, song lyrics...
1137
01:14:48,050 --> 01:14:48,985
Lyrics?
1138
01:14:48,985 --> 01:14:50,043
You write songs?
1139
01:14:52,555 --> 01:14:53,544
What?
1140
01:14:53,856 --> 01:14:55,483
C'mon. Suddenly you're shy?
1141
01:14:55,791 --> 01:14:57,760
I thought they were
brilliant and insightful.
1142
01:14:57,760 --> 01:14:58,727
They are.
1143
01:14:58,961 --> 01:15:00,656
And potentially highly embarrassing.
1144
01:15:05,601 --> 01:15:07,034
Hey, you know what?
1145
01:15:07,269 --> 01:15:08,896
Why don't we write a song.
1146
01:15:09,505 --> 01:15:11,530
I'll do the music, you write the lyrics.
1147
01:15:12,775 --> 01:15:13,764
Okay.
1148
01:15:17,880 --> 01:15:20,713
I thought your father banned
music from your heart.
1149
01:15:21,017 --> 01:15:23,315
Oh yeah, that.
1150
01:15:24,854 --> 01:15:28,517
Well, like you said,
I have to stand up to him someday.
1151
01:15:29,658 --> 01:15:33,321
So...Screw Lawrence and his scholarships.
1152
01:15:36,198 --> 01:15:38,723
So... Are we cool?
1153
01:15:50,813 --> 01:15:51,837
Chance?!
1154
01:16:00,890 --> 01:16:02,482
Is your brother really sick?
1155
01:16:04,226 --> 01:16:05,716
Okay, what's the deal?
1156
01:16:06,262 --> 01:16:07,596
Apparently his entire school
1157
01:16:07,596 --> 01:16:10,087
found out he dressed up in drag
and performed at a club.
1158
01:16:10,633 --> 01:16:11,600
What?!
1159
01:16:12,168 --> 01:16:14,261
Then they put his picture
on a bunch of flyers
1160
01:16:14,670 --> 01:16:18,697
labelling him an embarrassment to all that is
held holy in the high school male.
1161
01:16:21,277 --> 01:16:23,575
Why can't you kids have normal problems?
1162
01:16:23,946 --> 01:16:25,038
Like acne.
1163
01:16:26,982 --> 01:16:28,074
Time for school.
1164
01:16:35,424 --> 01:16:37,324
Well, he's not at the loser-table...
1165
01:16:38,327 --> 01:16:39,692
...he wasn't in Lit...
1166
01:16:41,097 --> 01:16:43,930
Looks like
'Operation: Get-Rid-Of-Fag' worked.
1167
01:16:46,135 --> 01:16:47,363
Stop calling him that.
1168
01:16:49,138 --> 01:16:50,537
What'd you say Sparks?
1169
01:16:51,173 --> 01:16:52,902
This wasn't cool.
1170
01:16:53,209 --> 01:16:55,939
If he wants to dress up like a girl,
that's his business.
1171
01:16:57,780 --> 01:17:01,546
How'd you like it if everyone knew you fooled
around with Kenny Ellis in sixth grade?
1172
01:17:04,920 --> 01:17:06,388
So tell me Sparks,
1173
01:17:06,388 --> 01:17:08,413
when exactly did you grow a pair, huh?
1174
01:17:09,158 --> 01:17:11,456
When I figured out
you don't really have friends.
1175
01:17:12,361 --> 01:17:14,727
Just subjects who live in fear of you.
1176
01:17:17,199 --> 01:17:18,791
You don't want to do this, Man.
1177
01:17:19,268 --> 01:17:20,292
Trust me,
1178
01:17:20,569 --> 01:17:22,469
you don't want to go there with me.
1179
01:17:23,139 --> 01:17:25,733
You know what, Brad?
I feel sorry for you.
1180
01:17:26,709 --> 01:17:28,939
Because right here, right now...
1181
01:17:29,545 --> 01:17:31,945
is the best it'll ever be for you.
1182
01:17:32,314 --> 01:17:34,339
Well, you never were too bright.
1183
01:17:40,222 --> 01:17:41,780
Take your best shot.
1184
01:17:49,598 --> 01:17:50,656
Brad!
1185
01:17:52,234 --> 01:17:53,462
Are you okay?
1186
01:17:55,070 --> 01:17:56,594
Oh my God, you're like... bleeding.
1187
01:17:58,641 --> 01:18:01,667
Yeah, that's what I thought would happen.
1188
01:18:10,853 --> 01:18:12,081
Are you looking for something?
1189
01:18:12,888 --> 01:18:14,219
Inspiration.
1190
01:18:25,568 --> 01:18:29,163
You know, Chance, there's a link
between inspiration and perspiration.
1191
01:18:31,040 --> 01:18:32,905
What you need is focus.
1192
01:18:34,677 --> 01:18:37,046
How about I send you back Stateside.
1193
01:18:37,046 --> 01:18:39,114
I found a military academy
in the Midwest--
1194
01:18:39,114 --> 01:18:40,376
Please...
1195
01:18:40,783 --> 01:18:42,045
Just stop.
1196
01:18:43,352 --> 01:18:46,879
I'm never gonna understand you the way
your mother did, I know that.
1197
01:18:47,022 --> 01:18:48,751
Well, I don't need you to.
1198
01:18:48,991 --> 01:18:50,322
Then, what do you need?
1199
01:18:51,160 --> 01:18:54,323
For you to stop running this house
like a military operation.
1200
01:18:55,931 --> 01:18:57,694
We're not a team, we're a family.
1201
01:18:58,934 --> 01:19:02,665
Sienna and I,
we're not your soldiers or cadets.
1202
01:19:04,073 --> 01:19:05,370
We're your kids.
1203
01:19:05,741 --> 01:19:09,178
No kid I know enjoys discipline.
I'm not gonna apologize for that.
1204
01:19:09,178 --> 01:19:10,770
I'm not talking about discipline.
1205
01:19:11,247 --> 01:19:12,544
I don't mind rules.
1206
01:19:13,182 --> 01:19:14,774
But you need to let me be
who I'm gonna be.
1207
01:19:15,150 --> 01:19:16,515
I think I do.
1208
01:19:16,952 --> 01:19:20,888
Except every time you look at me, all I see
is you wishing I were someone else.
1209
01:19:21,323 --> 01:19:22,654
Anyone else.
1210
01:19:23,959 --> 01:19:25,927
Nothing about me makes you proud.
1211
01:19:27,796 --> 01:19:29,195
How do you know that?
1212
01:19:30,866 --> 01:19:34,632
Because every time you look at Sienna, I see
exactly what that pride looks like.
1213
01:19:39,375 --> 01:19:41,434
Put this stuff away when you're done.
1214
01:20:19,214 --> 01:20:20,203
What?!
1215
01:20:20,849 --> 01:20:22,680
Have you talked to Chance?...
1216
01:20:23,018 --> 01:20:24,787
'cause he won't return our calls.
1217
01:20:24,787 --> 01:20:27,722
Yeah, we've gotta make sure he didn't kill
himself.
1218
01:20:29,992 --> 01:20:31,721
You're a photographer, right?
1219
01:20:32,094 --> 01:20:33,527
What gave it away?
1220
01:20:34,330 --> 01:20:35,627
Who are you?
1221
01:20:37,499 --> 01:20:39,364
We're scared of her.
1222
01:20:42,871 --> 01:20:44,839
Meet me here, after school today.
1223
01:20:45,507 --> 01:20:46,769
And bring that.
1224
01:20:49,144 --> 01:20:51,112
Can we stop following him now?
1225
01:20:51,747 --> 01:20:53,271
Okay, c'mon.
1226
01:21:11,633 --> 01:21:12,622
Hey guys!
1227
01:21:12,868 --> 01:21:14,036
What's this?
1228
01:21:14,036 --> 01:21:15,094
New band:
1229
01:21:15,304 --> 01:21:16,532
'Dramatic Pause.'
1230
01:21:16,972 --> 01:21:18,574
Chance is our lead singer.
1231
01:21:18,574 --> 01:21:20,007
Wow! That's neat.
1232
01:21:20,576 --> 01:21:22,635
We need some band photos -
for flyers and stuff.
1233
01:21:22,778 --> 01:21:23,712
Can you do it?
1234
01:21:23,712 --> 01:21:25,680
Yeah, sure I can.
1235
01:21:27,282 --> 01:21:29,318
We're competing at
the battle of the bands
1236
01:21:29,318 --> 01:21:30,285
and we require a manager.
1237
01:21:30,853 --> 01:21:31,979
Interested?
1238
01:21:32,087 --> 01:21:33,122
Manager?
1239
01:21:33,122 --> 01:21:35,522
You're a high-school band
doing Toto covers...
1240
01:21:35,724 --> 01:21:36,792
badly.
1241
01:21:36,792 --> 01:21:39,352
What you really need is to be
put out of your misery.
1242
01:21:46,702 --> 01:21:47,964
I'm in.
1243
01:21:48,470 --> 01:21:49,664
Cool.
1244
01:22:40,289 --> 01:22:41,290
Whoa...
1245
01:22:41,290 --> 01:22:43,850
This is a whole lot of people!
1246
01:22:46,328 --> 01:22:50,697
Hey! Listen, I arranged for some insurance
to make sure Dramatic Pause stands out.
1247
01:22:51,033 --> 01:22:52,301
You bought off the judges?!
1248
01:22:52,301 --> 01:22:53,268
Even better-
1249
01:22:53,469 --> 01:22:56,097
You... killed the judges?
1250
01:22:56,338 --> 01:22:58,898
Will you just shut up and listen?!
1251
01:23:17,392 --> 01:23:18,552
Where's Chance?
1252
01:23:19,361 --> 01:23:20,453
With you...
1253
01:23:21,463 --> 01:23:22,760
Weren't you picking him up?
1254
01:23:26,134 --> 01:23:29,297
So, what are we supposed to do
if Chance doesn't show?
1255
01:23:34,209 --> 01:23:35,267
Hi, Lawrence.
1256
01:23:35,677 --> 01:23:37,372
Do you know about that?
1257
01:23:39,748 --> 01:23:41,116
When did this happen?
1258
01:23:41,116 --> 01:23:43,243
It's been brewing
for the past two weeks, or so.
1259
01:23:43,752 --> 01:23:45,686
Levi and Chance wrote a song together.
1260
01:23:46,622 --> 01:23:47,680
Is it any good?
1261
01:23:48,257 --> 01:23:49,458
I haven't heard it yet.
1262
01:23:49,458 --> 01:23:51,827
Look, Levi's grounded,
and now he's gone.
1263
01:23:51,827 --> 01:23:54,159
And I'm willing to bet your son has
got something to do with that.
1264
01:23:54,763 --> 01:23:56,265
I wanna talk to him right now-
1265
01:23:56,265 --> 01:23:57,732
Chance isn't here.
1266
01:23:58,567 --> 01:24:00,091
His band goes on at five.
1267
01:24:00,335 --> 01:24:01,359
Can we go?
1268
01:24:04,273 --> 01:24:05,365
Get your coat.
1269
01:24:05,841 --> 01:24:07,638
But wait, I have to get changed first.
1270
01:24:11,647 --> 01:24:15,777
You know what someone should really invent?
Portable phones.
1271
01:24:17,653 --> 01:24:19,955
C'mon, let's go and see
if we can find him.
1272
01:24:19,955 --> 01:24:22,287
You go over there and you
check back there, okay?
1273
01:24:32,467 --> 01:24:33,434
Chance!
1274
01:24:34,069 --> 01:24:35,229
You guys, go look up there.
1275
01:24:36,238 --> 01:24:37,102
Chance?!
1276
01:24:46,315 --> 01:24:49,045
Maybe it's better if we split up.
1277
01:24:58,594 --> 01:24:59,754
Chance!
1278
01:24:59,995 --> 01:25:00,862
Where were you?
1279
01:25:00,862 --> 01:25:02,329
We were starting to think you bailed.
1280
01:25:02,931 --> 01:25:03,966
Oh look,
1281
01:25:03,966 --> 01:25:05,334
it's the Flock-of-Faggots.
1282
01:25:05,334 --> 01:25:07,131
What are you playing,
'Disco Up The Ass'?
1283
01:25:09,605 --> 01:25:11,402
Have you seen Levi anywhere?
1284
01:25:11,640 --> 01:25:12,902
I don't see either of them.
1285
01:25:18,280 --> 01:25:20,180
Is that Chance over there?
1286
01:25:46,408 --> 01:25:49,002
Look at them, they're spectacular!
1287
01:25:58,320 --> 01:25:59,921
What are you doing up here?
1288
01:25:59,921 --> 01:26:01,548
Nice introduction, your idea?
1289
01:26:03,258 --> 01:26:04,452
I can't go on...
1290
01:26:04,826 --> 01:26:05,727
Why?
1291
01:26:05,727 --> 01:26:06,489
What's wrong?
1292
01:26:07,295 --> 01:26:09,263
Stage fright is my best guess.
1293
01:26:09,765 --> 01:26:11,562
Or maybe an intestinal parasite.
1294
01:26:12,067 --> 01:26:13,227
Ladies...
1295
01:26:15,570 --> 01:26:18,038
Okay, you hormonal mess of a crowd,
1296
01:26:18,273 --> 01:26:20,173
are you ready for the next band?!
1297
01:26:24,913 --> 01:26:27,006
Please welcome my Rockettes!
1298
01:26:29,117 --> 01:26:31,085
What the hell is that?!
1299
01:26:31,687 --> 01:26:33,154
A chorus line, duh!
1300
01:26:33,522 --> 01:26:35,046
Aren't they fabulous?
1301
01:26:35,724 --> 01:26:38,249
I said, aren't they FABULOUS!
1302
01:26:43,565 --> 01:26:44,933
Listen to me.
1303
01:26:44,933 --> 01:26:47,502
If singing in a dress and high-heels
in front of two-hundred drunks
1304
01:26:47,502 --> 01:26:50,960
isn't going to prepare you for this,
then nothing ever will.
1305
01:26:51,206 --> 01:26:52,207
This is cake!
1306
01:26:52,207 --> 01:26:53,674
You don't understand...
1307
01:26:54,309 --> 01:26:56,334
pretending to be someone else is easy.
1308
01:26:56,778 --> 01:26:59,147
It's an act...dress-up.
1309
01:26:59,147 --> 01:27:00,716
I can hide behind top hats--
1310
01:27:00,716 --> 01:27:02,547
I thought you were done hiding.
1311
01:27:03,118 --> 01:27:05,143
Don't you want them
to see the real Chance?
1312
01:27:06,421 --> 01:27:08,252
Just go out there and sing.
1313
01:27:08,890 --> 01:27:09,857
Great advice.
1314
01:27:10,058 --> 01:27:12,494
And besides,
if they start throwing anything,
1315
01:27:12,494 --> 01:27:14,894
it'll be at Levi
and his lousy guitar playing.
1316
01:27:17,766 --> 01:27:19,324
Just stand up to all of 'em.
1317
01:27:19,835 --> 01:27:21,132
Now's your chance.
1318
01:27:21,870 --> 01:27:23,201
Stand up.
1319
01:27:26,508 --> 01:27:30,045
So, I want you all to put your hands
together for the next band.
1320
01:27:30,045 --> 01:27:32,914
It's led by a close, personal friend of mine.
1321
01:27:32,914 --> 01:27:34,850
And honeys, if you like good music,
1322
01:27:34,850 --> 01:27:37,546
you can turn on the radio after the concert.
1323
01:27:38,687 --> 01:27:42,714
In the meantime, here they are...
in all their Oxy-cream glory:
1324
01:27:43,291 --> 01:27:45,225
The Dramatic Pause!
1325
01:28:15,590 --> 01:28:19,161
I live in a different world
1326
01:28:19,161 --> 01:28:22,688
See things my own way
1327
01:28:23,398 --> 01:28:26,925
Got no shame for what I do
1328
01:28:27,335 --> 01:28:30,395
What else should I say
1329
01:28:31,273 --> 01:28:34,174
Who do we become
1330
01:28:35,410 --> 01:28:38,311
Add up all the sums
1331
01:28:39,281 --> 01:28:42,546
Part of me will be okay
1332
01:28:43,018 --> 01:28:46,010
The rest will be undone
1333
01:28:46,621 --> 01:28:48,824
Stand Up for all of your dreams
1334
01:28:48,824 --> 01:28:50,926
Leave the ones that have been
1335
01:28:50,926 --> 01:28:52,928
See how far we have come
1336
01:28:52,928 --> 01:28:55,063
Never have to succumb
1337
01:28:55,063 --> 01:28:57,265
Take your friends by your side
1338
01:28:57,265 --> 01:28:59,100
And just go for that ride
1339
01:28:59,100 --> 01:29:01,570
Don't worry who you are
1340
01:29:01,570 --> 01:29:03,902
Stand Up and you'll go far
1341
01:29:05,607 --> 01:29:08,405
Stand Up and you'll go far
1342
01:29:11,213 --> 01:29:14,478
Some people have all the luck
1343
01:29:15,250 --> 01:29:17,684
Born with looks and a buck
1344
01:29:19,087 --> 01:29:22,454
And then there is the rest of us
1345
01:29:22,958 --> 01:29:26,018
The strange and messed up
1346
01:29:27,162 --> 01:29:29,892
You think you are one
1347
01:29:30,765 --> 01:29:33,825
Boy you sure are dumb
1348
01:29:34,970 --> 01:29:38,406
Look at us and then decide
1349
01:29:38,940 --> 01:29:41,841
Who is Jekyll, who is Hyde?
1350
01:29:42,143 --> 01:29:44,512
Stand Up for all of your dreams
1351
01:29:44,512 --> 01:29:46,448
Leave the ones that have been
1352
01:29:46,448 --> 01:29:48,550
See how far you can go
1353
01:29:48,550 --> 01:29:50,279
Then get ready to blow--
1354
01:29:50,485 --> 01:29:52,077
Mr. Harden!
1355
01:29:53,221 --> 01:29:55,212
I want a word with you.
1356
01:30:00,562 --> 01:30:02,587
Care to explain?!
1357
01:30:07,669 --> 01:30:09,938
Stand Up for all of your dreams
1358
01:30:09,938 --> 01:30:11,973
Leave the ones that have been
1359
01:30:11,973 --> 01:30:13,909
See how far you can go
1360
01:30:13,909 --> 01:30:16,177
Then get ready to blow
1361
01:30:16,177 --> 01:30:18,013
Take the low-times in stride
1362
01:30:18,013 --> 01:30:20,048
Bring the high-times inside
1363
01:30:20,048 --> 01:30:22,717
Don't worry who you are
1364
01:30:22,717 --> 01:30:24,947
Stand Up and you'll go far
1365
01:30:26,454 --> 01:30:29,651
Stand Up and you'll go far
1366
01:30:30,492 --> 01:30:32,960
Stand Up and you'll go far
1367
01:30:34,462 --> 01:30:37,625
Stand Up and you'll go far
1368
01:30:38,500 --> 01:30:40,832
Stand Up and you'll go far
1369
01:30:42,437 --> 01:30:45,531
Stand Up and you'll go far
1370
01:31:17,539 --> 01:31:19,473
Why didn't you tell me you had a band?
1371
01:31:20,141 --> 01:31:22,405
I didn't think you were ready
for another singer in the family.
1372
01:31:24,913 --> 01:31:28,679
Well, maybe you should let me decide what
I may or may not be ready for.
1373
01:31:30,218 --> 01:31:32,311
But thanks for looking out for me.
1374
01:31:34,789 --> 01:31:36,051
I got your back.
1375
01:31:37,459 --> 01:31:39,757
I'm sorry, I haven't always had yours.
1376
01:31:41,863 --> 01:31:43,592
You were great out there today, Son.
1377
01:31:46,234 --> 01:31:48,293
You know,
they have bands in the Army...
1378
01:31:51,406 --> 01:31:52,464
Think about it.
1379
01:31:52,607 --> 01:31:53,631
Go.
1380
01:32:02,450 --> 01:32:03,718
Expelled?
1381
01:32:03,718 --> 01:32:05,777
As in, total expulsion?
1382
01:32:06,755 --> 01:32:10,358
And the best part is,
the idiot practically tumed himself in.
1383
01:32:10,358 --> 01:32:13,695
He started raging at a practice while
Smelt-her was watching...
1384
01:32:13,695 --> 01:32:15,663
so, she got suspicious.
1385
01:32:15,663 --> 01:32:17,062
Hey, Twyla...
1386
01:32:19,434 --> 01:32:22,270
Oh hey, don't forget about the gig
I booked you on Saturday night.
1387
01:32:22,270 --> 01:32:23,838
My cousin Claudia's wedding.
1388
01:32:23,838 --> 01:32:27,001
So start boning up
on your Barry Manilow.
1389
01:32:30,845 --> 01:32:33,075
Hey, I got concert photos for you.
1390
01:32:33,148 --> 01:32:34,172
Oh good!
1391
01:32:38,186 --> 01:32:39,448
Thank you.
1392
01:32:44,659 --> 01:32:46,024
Anything else?
1393
01:32:47,262 --> 01:32:49,230
You want to know what's inside?
1394
01:32:49,564 --> 01:32:50,758
Of course.
1395
01:32:51,099 --> 01:32:52,133
But you can't tell me.
1396
01:32:52,133 --> 01:32:53,134
To wit, Hank:
1397
01:32:53,134 --> 01:32:55,728
should I become privy, and Smelker finds out...
1398
01:32:56,104 --> 01:32:59,335
and finds some way to circumvent
standard administrative protocol
1399
01:32:59,507 --> 01:33:03,466
and torture me to the point where I have no
choice but to reveal what I know.
1400
01:33:04,879 --> 01:33:06,039
Torture...
1401
01:33:06,748 --> 01:33:07,976
Torture.
1402
01:33:09,484 --> 01:33:10,849
Good point.
1403
01:33:16,724 --> 01:33:18,749
I know you wanted to know...
1404
01:33:18,860 --> 01:33:22,455
but I think my well-being supersedes your
low-minded curiosity in this case.
1405
01:34:04,572 --> 01:34:08,338
I know what you're thinking:
another 'Chance-Fantasy-Sequence.'
1406
01:34:08,743 --> 01:34:10,643
Maybe...maybe not.
1407
01:34:10,945 --> 01:34:13,004
But, let's be clear about one thing,
1408
01:34:13,148 --> 01:34:15,309
this is my version of the story...
1409
01:34:26,227 --> 01:34:28,354
I told you, you were in for some perspective...
1410
01:34:29,230 --> 01:34:30,198
No doubt about it...
1411
01:34:30,198 --> 01:34:33,133
high school's mostly irritating
and an abomination.
1412
01:34:33,268 --> 01:34:35,361
But, you make the best of it...